Undergraduate / Visual art, Wellesley College; 'my future is ensured' [2]

Visual art is one of my first interests that have influenced my current decisions. With the support of my parents, I have been involved in the field of art all my life. Starting out with Safari Animals coloring book and continue on with pencil sketching. My parents are very considerate, and always give me space and quiet when I am drawing or painting. My cousin, Tammy, also play a large influence in my life. Because of the influence of my cousin who exposed me the world of three-dimensional design, I have realized that there is another field of art call architecture. Architecture combines both of the activities I love the most; two dimensional drawings, and constructing crafty projects. My experience from the first architecture class has made me realize that architecture is the field I want to pursue.

Wellesley College will help me pursue what I love most, by allowing me to explore the world of architecture and its related fields in a familiar atmosphere like that of my hometown. The college's campus is beautiful with a near by picturesque lake, grassy pastures and lovely forest; an architectural statement itself. I also like the small and cozy classroom size, where it is easier to interact with the professors and in turn, understanding the materials better. I will be able to succeed academically while achieving the knowledge and training best for my major. I believe that architecture is more than an art form, but it has the qualities to bring people together. I am sure that the influence of a close community relationship demonstrated at Wellesley College, I will learn how to design housing for communities that would make a difference in others' lives. At Wellesley College, my future is ensured because of the impressive academic resources and high-tech facilities that the undergraduate institution offers to its students.

Undergraduate / Common App and how to start the art supplement? [15]

Do I need to enter the commn app for the school that I have already enter the School's application? does any one know how to do the ART SUPPLEMENT on common app?

Writing Feedback / The person I admire happens to be my rival - Essay on Role model [13]

My Rival
It is not difficult to find someone to admire and look up to, which is true in my case except for one part; the person I admire happens to be my rival. Tammy is a construction management graduate whom I have admired since elementary school. The concentrations she put into her major were so vividly shown that it is hard not to be captivated. Tammy is the kind of person who would not let herself gets bogged down because of minor mishaps, or that time was not on her side for completing a project. It is her motivation and passion that captivated me, and it was then that she became the sole figure in which I want to surpass.

Tammy was always working on some kind of project when ever I go to visit her. She would hover over the large table which contains multiple house plans and next to it would be a scaled model matching its every detail. Although it was incomprehensible to me at the time as to what she was doing, her enthusiasm and intensity for the work had captured all my intention. I would emerge myself in observing her very movement and only released my sight from her to blink my eyes. Tammy would work from one hour to the next with careful movement of clueing and measuring out the parts that would fit in the scaled structure. When she finished the work, she asked if I liked it or not. I did not answer her. I just stood next to it and stared at the small like doll house with its impressive design. I thought to myself, I would like to make one too. So I asked her if I could make one. Her answer was to take a class call Architecture when I enter high school.

Then high school came, and my long wait to attend the Architecture class became a reality in my sophomore year. The class was classified as Architecture I. It was a normal size class of 15 students chatted up the large room to a new pitch as if trying to obtain a new record for the intensity of their volume. Yet the calamity of the class did not seem to reach my ears. I was unaffected by everything; I was concentrating on the spacious room before me. I scanned the room from top to bottom carefully and slowly. My eyes were captivated by the numerous scaled houses like the ones that Tammy worked on. The room was filled with two-dimensional drawings that were tacked up on the walls and construction models of scaled houses were scattered on the large tables to one side of the class room. There were displays of various construction models made of all type of materials. It was wonderful and exciting feeling that tingled through my body. I have entered the world that Tamy is in, where imagination and creativity soars freely through the confined room.

I have a major problem... Its suppose to be 500 words maximum and I have reached 494 :} But I haven't written the conclusion yet

Could you advise on how to condense the essay and a suggestion on how to conclude the conclusion with details..:} thnx

I don't think this tell much about me...Its already 668 words, Please help.