khanhlinhpham
Aug 4, 2013
Writing Feedback / IELTS: Is change good for people or not? [6]
There has been much debate
changes are very necessary for people to have something new in their life.
(avoid repetition)
people fed up with their daily routine
"enjoy" is a transitive verb. It has to be followed by an object. I think you should change the phrase into something like "they would like to have changes"
I think this sentence is somewhat confusing.
changes are very helpful to the development of mind
(watch out for articles: the <noun> of <noun>)
problems and failures
On the other hand
Everyone has habits that they do not want to change
This phrase is grammatically correct. However, personally, I think that it should be "the main reason is that"
afraid of their future being altered
due to security and familiarities with others, people do not want to change
life in the tradition way keeps our culture and native language alive.
.In conclusion/To sum up
people adApt to changes
I think your conclusion should restate the thesis statement in your introduction. "In conclusion, changes are an essential part of life and people are adapting to them for many reasons".
deal with them
There have been much debate
There has been much debate
changes is very necessary for life to have something new in our life .
changes are very necessary for people to have something new in their life.
(avoid repetition)
people fed up their daily routine life
people fed up with their daily routine
they want changes to enjoy
"enjoy" is a transitive verb. It has to be followed by an object. I think you should change the phrase into something like "they would like to have changes"
Only those people can do this, who want to reach at the top level in their career.
I think this sentence is somewhat confusing.
changes are very helpful to development of mind
changes are very helpful to the development of mind
(watch out for articles: the <noun> of <noun>)
problems and failure
problems and failures
how to to handle
On the other side
On the other hand
Everyone has habits that do not let them change
Everyone has habits that they do not want to change
the important issue is that
This phrase is grammatically correct. However, personally, I think that it should be "the main reason is that"
afraid of their future to be altered
afraid of their future being altered
due to security and familiarities with others people do not want to change
due to security and familiarities with others, people do not want to change
life in traditional way, keeps alive our culture and mother tongue.
life in the tradition way keeps our culture and native language alive.
In nutshell
.In conclusion/To sum up
people adopt changes
people adApt to changes
I think your conclusion should restate the thesis statement in your introduction. "In conclusion, changes are an essential part of life and people are adapting to them for many reasons".
deal with it
deal with them