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Posts by lovejapanjapan
Name: christopher
Joined: Jun 3, 2015
Last Post: Jun 4, 2015
Threads: 1
Posts: 3  
From: Singapore

Displayed posts: 4
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lovejapanjapan   
Jun 4, 2015
Writing Feedback / Freedom to work and live anywhere. [6]

Recently the freedom to work and live anywhere has become the main trend due to the development of communication technology and transportation
Your first sentence seems like a vague idea and i don't see any relation between ICT and freedom to work and live. Could you further justify it ? Anyway, we are still learning.
lovejapanjapan   
Jun 3, 2015
Writing Feedback / The increase of advance technology over the years is resonating around us, students. [4]

Thank you justivy03, belows are the two paragraphs. Two more paragraphs that discuss about the negative sides are coming too and thanks a million, IqbalThemi. Your intro is a brilliant one but i wanna write both sides of arguements.

Such a dependency on the Internet would definitely give birth to students and scholars who are not only academically excellent but also externally knowledgeable. Students who often use the Internet to search important information on the relevant aspects such as grammar review, subject-based problems and solutions would instill positive habits of reading, willingness to learn and also this beneficial exposure allows them to progress further and faster in comparison with those who are inactive learning online. This would create brighter , well-refined students that would be of more benefits to society.

Other than that, the Internet access creates a platform for students all over the countries to be a borderless community in the world as we live in today.

Without separate boundaries, information is linked and transferred fast without limitations. In other words, this may act as a motivator for students to be more competitive among their peers. A healthy form of competitiveness would bring about more like-minded individuals and weed out students that could not care less about their future career. As a result, this would create chain reaction that extends far beyond the level of tertiary education and into the working world whereby students, employees and employers alike would be more hardworking in order to compete globally either to gain entry into prestigious universities or firms as well.
lovejapanjapan   
Jun 3, 2015
Writing Feedback / The increase of advance technology over the years is resonating around us, students. [4]

The increase in the advancement of technology over the years is resulting around us, as we can see, more and more people sticking their hands with the latest Ipads, smartphones everywhere and anytime even children are doing so. The pursuit of material goods also seems prevailing nowadays among the students whether to make their paperwork more easier or simply have access with their friends online. Therefore, while a tendency like this may help in dealing with school works and assignments, problems may arise in the foreseeable future causing adverse effects to the students themselves.

How about this intro ? Please comment.If this topic is coming out in ielts, what band should I get. I will write the other three paragraphs and a conclusion as well in the coming post.
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