Writing Feedback / alternatives of learning - help me to improve my CBEST writing essay [2]

Hello,
I am preparing for CBEST exam, I want to became a Spanish teacher. This is the last test that I need to pass, and I am trying to write one test a day. Please help me to improve my writing. Any comment is welcome.

Comment - one more unhelpful post in other student's topic = suspension.

Many recent high school graduates discover that, despite possessing a high school diploma, they have no specific skills to enable them to obtain employment. Explain your feelings about introducing a vocational skills program as an alternative choice to the academic high school curriculum.

Almost all the high schools in the United States prepare students in academic skills rather than vocational in vocational skills. Are all the students mean to be successful in academic skills? Or these students should have the opportunity to success other areas of learning. After reflecting on the idea of introducing a vocational skill program as an alternative for high school students, I came to the conclusion that this program could be very beneficial for students and society because students could show more interest in learning, they can explore other skills besides academics, and a vocational program could diminish frustration and failure in students' life too.

People only learn what it is interesting and relevant for them; some students are not interested in learning school subjects, and they fail on this purpose. But if students have the opportunity to learn what they like it, they mostly are going to be successful on it. For instance, I was trying to teach my daughter the letters of the alphabet when she was four years old. For this project, I bought many kinds of gadget for her to help her learning such as puzzles, books, stickers, and beads, but she did not show any interest on it. About the same time, we were reading books about dolphins and animals from the sea, and she really wanted to know more about them, so we took her to the Pacific Aquarium. On our visit, she asked many of the experts about the lives and body parts of the dolphins. Now, she can explain anybody about these animals because she learned about them-she wanted to learn.

By giving students the opportunity of experiencing new skills, students can discover their real talents. Many students think that because they are not good at school, they cannot be virtuous at doing anything else. As an example, in my last year of high school, my school principal gave us the opportunity of taking some vocational classes at the occupational center of my city. For many of us it was only a fun experience, but for one of my classmates was the beginning of his career as a jewelry designer. Now, as a famous jewelry artist, he travels around the world showing his pieces of art. He probably had not discovered his ability making jewelry if he did not have the opportunity to learn early in life.

Also, a vocation skill program could be a lifesaver for many students that did not do well in academics, and they believe that they are good for nothing, ending up in gangs or drugs abuse. Students have to understand that society needs many kinds of services and not all are fulfilled by the students that go to college. Manual abilities are also important and valuable for society. To illustrate, last year, I was taking cake decorating classes at the West Valley Occupational Center in Woodland Hills, California, and one of my peers was studying to pass her GED exam. She was very frustrated and felt depressed about not passing her test yet. At the end of the class semester, she discovered that she was very good making wedding cakes so she started cake decorating as her business. Now, her attitude about life had changed. She is very happy about what she does for a living, and she does not feel depressed anymore. Learning how to make cakes not only gave her an income, but also a new reason of happiness in life.

In conclusion, giving students other alternatives of learning is not only beneficial for students that benefit by learning what they like and have the opportunity of practicing other skills, but also for society that needs highly qualified, motivated professionals in all the working areas. Specialization in all kind of skills should be offered as an alternative early in students' life. After all, we not only need engineers or lawyer; we also need bakers and carpenter. And why not to be a lawyer, who knows carpentry.

Writing Feedback / CBEST: Experimentally grouped ungraded students by the level of achievements and not by age [3]

Recent educational experiments have included ungraded classrooms which consist of students grouped by level of achievement rather than by age. Imagine that such an ungraded classroom system is suggested for your school. As a parent, write a strong argument to be read at the next meeting of the board of education

The first day that my daughter went to kindergarten, I noticed something at her classroom that concerned me. She was almost three-year-old, but she was in a class with three, four, and five years old. My concern was that older children could hurt her or teach her behaviors that she was not ready to learn. It has been three years since that day. Now, I believe that classes grouped by level of achievement rather than by age are very beneficial for society because there is not a rush for children to develop in all their skills at the same time, a different age class environment is more realistic to actual society, and same grouped by level of achievement classes are more effective for students and teacher.

Many children can have the same age, but they not develop at the same time in the same skills. There are four basic skills that children master at an early age; social, emotional, cognitive, and physical. Some children need more time for mastering a skill such as cognitive skill. Pushing children to the next level without been ready, only causes frustration and failing. I support the concept that children only learn when they are ready, so I consider a waste of time and energy to try to teach a concept when they are not ready. For example, my daughter's best friend is two years older than her, and she is very good in sports, but she is taking more time learning to read. She used to enjoy being at my daughter's school where they classified children by achievement rather than age. Now, she is in a classroom with children of her own age, and she is expressing her frustration and rejection to school.

In addition, an age mixed class makes a more realistic social environment where older children help little ones and young children learn from older ones. For instance, last year my husband and I spent almost six months trying to potty train my daughter, but it was not until she went to preschool that she learn to go potty by herself. She observed and followed older children; she understood that she could do it to. This year, she is the oldest one in her class and, I was very proud of her when she was trying to comfort a younger child the first day of classes. A mixed age class gave her the opportunity to teach and learn.

Furthermore, a same level of achievement class will allow teacher to focus more in a specific subject rather than be creating different materials for different needs. On the case that all the children in the class are learning their letters, the teacher will have more time to prepare games and projects related to that activity instead of distracting their attention in other children needs such as teach them how to cut a paper.

Any subject in life should be taught at the level of the person who is learning it. Age is not an indicator of knowledge. Having same level of achievement classes will benefit society because students are going to be more motivated to learn-they want to learn. For the people who do not agree with this concept, they should understand that human being does not develop and acquire skills at the same age. We are not always ready to pass to the next level.

Writing Feedback / Some have argued that imagination is not as important as perspiration. CBEST writing [3]

Some have argued that imagination is not as important as perspiration. To what extent you agree or disagree.

There are two kinds of people in the world; the ones that dream, and the ones that make dreams to come true. Imagination is a vital characteristic of a human being, but I believe that hard working people that make dreams to come true are more valuable for society. Hard working people not only imaging things, but they also master skills, reach goals and investigate further.

Skills are only mastered by investing time and effort. Imagination itself does not have value if this idea do not has a person who works hard to make the idea real. When I picture famous inventors, I always see them working really hard in their labs, experimenting with trial and error. Their great ideas were only the beginning of a great discovery or revolution. For example, Steve Jobs not only had the idea of building personal computer, but he also worked many hours trying to build his idea and carry it to the market. Great ideas are cunning, but only with hard work are useful for society.

Working hard is also a way to reach goals. I not only believe that we can do something, but also that we can implement a plan to make it happen. Successful business did not only emerge from an idea, along with that idea was plan to carry idea. For example, when my friend and I had the idea of exporting quinoa from Peru, she implemented a whole plan of how to buy the product from farmers and sell it to Europe and the United States' clients. She visited farmers and clients, made contracts, install a plant for product packaging. We had the idea together, but she made the product come true by hard work. She benefited a whole community of quinoa producers.

Finally, hardworking and experimentation is a good way to see other outcomes and possibilities. When you are working on something, you can see other way to get better outcomes. For example, my friend that was exporting quinoa, found other markets and products to export such as tropical fruits and handcraft. This vision could not be possible if she was not already in the market.

Nurture imagination and creativity is beneficial as long as we understand that this is only the beginning of the process. In order to produce and contribute something to society, we have to work hard. Working hard it is the only way to cultivate skill, reach goals, and find better options in life. We have to teach our children not only that they can be any thing in life, but also that they have to work very hard for it.