Scholarship / Fast Food? sholud be banned ? - help me to correction or maybe add something in my essay. [4]

my argumentative essay.

Junk food is the term for a kind of food that people eat from a restaurant where food is prepared and served quickly. There are many kinds of junk food that we can find it easily such as hamburger, french fries, instant noodle, etc. Many people believe that junk food is food has a good taste and the cheap price that has so many benefits. It is fast and easy to eat food which makes you satisfy. I strongly disagree with it. Junk food is not good for people's health because of low nutrient and negative effects. Therefore, junk food should be banned for the following reasons : junk food leads to many weights and health related problems, makes people addiction and trigger mental disorders.

First of all, junk food leads to many weight and health related problems. For example, cardiovascular disease, high blood pressure, type two diabetes, and chronic health conditions are only some of the diseases they can get from eating junk food. In addition, the level of obesity is rising rapidly among kids and adolescents. According to researchers at Harvard university, "by the year 2050, the rate of obesity in the U.S. for kids is expected to reach 42%". This shows that in the future, junk foods reduce the quality of food and provide unhealthy choices especially among children and adolescents raising their risk of obesity. So, junk food can be so destructive towards people well-being and makes people overweight.

Secondly, junk food make people addiction which contains sugar and fat high that makes people's desire to eat it again. Consuming junk food such as french fries or burger can make a person constantly wants to consuming it. Some of the factors that make junk food is very appetizing is artificial sweeteners and food dyes. When artificial sweeteners and food dyes continuously go into their body, of course the effect will be very harmful for the body and your health. According to junior scholastic, "when fat-filled snacks melt quickly, your brain doesn't receive a message about the calories, so you just keep on eating". This result make people more desire of junk food and sweets. To sum up, consuming junk food once a week or more, they can addict to it.

Finally, junk food trigger mental disorders such as depression and alzheimer's. Mental disorders can also arise because of too "maniac" consuming junk food. According to a recent study headed by scientists from the university of Granada, eating junk food (hamburgers, hotdogs and pizza) is linked to depression. Besides, the content in junk food such as salt, processed meats, nitrates, and MSG can increasing hormonal especially in teenagers become depression. The content can also give effect become quickly forgotten or disorder in memory like Alzheimer. Consequently, now not only adults who have had problems in his memory, however also a lot of young children who become quickly forgotten because they are very fond of consuming junk food every day. In short, consuming junk food can cause a deficiency of important nutrients in the body, which increases many people suffer from depression and problem with they memory.

In conclusion, I strongly agree that junk food should be banned. Junk foods leads to overweight and can have health problem. Junk food contains many ingredients that can make people become addicted. By consuming junk food once a week or more, they can addict to it. The effect of people who have become addicted make it into a maniac with junk food is called mental disorders. Consuming junk food everyday you can get problem with your memory that can make you become quickly forgotten. I suggest to many people do not consuming junk food. For those who frequently consume junk food try to reduce the consumption of junk food if you don't want to overweight and obesity. Parents should monitor every nutrients in your kid food. Keep it away your kid from harmful food such as junk food.

Writing Feedback / "Bali Island" - the famous place in Indonesia. Descriptive or Expository Essay? [2]

Please help me to correction my essay.

Bali Island

Bali is a very famous island in Indonesia. Many tourists from all over the world visit each year. It is located between Java and Lombok. It has an area of 5620 square km. It has many tourist attractions which are interesting place to visit during a vacation on this island. One of the most famous and beautiful tourist attractions in Bali is the beaches. The most famous beaches that many tourism visited in Bali is Kuta beach, Sanur beach and Tanjung Benoa beach.

First, Kuta beach is the most visited beach by tourists because the beauty of the blue sea and the scenery. It is located in south of Denpasar City, Badung regency. It has white sand and several big coral stone. Besides beauty of blue sea panorama and white sand, Kuta beach also have good wave. The sound of the sea waves is so rhythmical, makes the people who having relaxed around the beach. The waves rolls are so amaze, and it can for play surfing. In addition, Kuta beach has a breathtaking sunset with its bright orange shine above the sea level. Many tourists sitting in the edge of the beach to see the sunset, make the situation around Kuta beach become crowded. So, Kuta beach is the most beautiful beach in Bali that is many visited by tourists and has awesome scenery.

Second, Sanur beach is a beautiful white sandy beach with calm and warm seawater located in east part of Denpasar Town. There are many shells for the avid collectors. The waves are calm, and it can for swimming. The sea very crystal clear where can see the sea creatures like starfish when walking at the beach. The atmosphere was fresh air and a comfortable sea breeze blowing. The Panorama south of Sanur beach is awesome sunrise in the morning. This beach is surrounded by many art shops that sell Balinese crafts, clothes, and accessories. Nearby the beach, it has The Le Mayeur Museum is paintings collection made by Balinese painter. To sum up, Sanur beach is a very wonderful panorama beach in Bali that has atmosphere calm and warm.

Tanjung Benoa beach is a quite beautiful beach. It is located at the tip of the Nusa Dua Peninsula. Tanjung Benoa is used to trurtles for breed so many foreigners call it turtle island. The beautiful of blue sea and white sand make this place become perfect scenery. There are many small huts on the beach for shelter and basking. Besides the wave on this beach is so calm and safe for water sports activities. In the beach, there have 'Glass bottom boats' to see the beauty of sea floor from boat and jetskis for water sport activities. Therefore, the situation is a bit crowded with tourists who are playing water sport. At the seaside, there are some trees such as palm trees and coconut trees to create coolness. In short, Tanjung Benoa beach is perfect scenery which has many sport activities.

In conclusion, Bali has many beautiful beaches that has different atmosphere each beach. Kuta beach well-known as breathtaking sunset, Sanur beach famous with awesome sunrise, and Tanjung Benoa beach is famous with water sport activities. I hope for the tourists, should maintain the beauty of every beaches. Do not pollute the beauty of the blue sea water with trash. And protect rare animals such as turtles and other marine creatures.

Writing Feedback / The Advantages of a Computer for Student: social networking, learning media, computer skills [3]

Advantages Computer for Students
by sharahma

Nowadays in modern world, using of computer technology has affected every field of life. Almost computer users not only adult but also students are already can use computer in their activity. They use computer in order to develop their ability. There are some advantages of computer for students from a social networking, learning process and computer skill.

First, the advantages from social networking like social media are to get information and communicate with others. The most social media which people use is Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and other social media. It can make easier to communicate with long distance friends. Besides, it can make students have friends in other countries. Moreover, students can exchange information with a lot of people about newcomers in the world of music, acting, drama, and other arts. So, they can use computer for different reasons.

Second, the advantages from learning process are students can use computer for their innovation in learning media. They can create engaging papers, presentations, and graphics by Microsoft Office. As example, to make engaging paper or assignment. students just need to type into the computer and can edit it easily if there are mistakes. they just need to print out their work; therefore, it can shorten time and makes other people easy to read. In addition to using the internet students can search information to broaden the knowledge, to get exercises, download E-books, audiobooks for their school subjects, And they also can transfer data or save data properly. The process of transfering data can be easier and faster by email. It is clear that computer can help students in learning process.

Third, the advantages from computer skill is students use a lot of microsoft office programs to improve their computer skill. Besides, students who create paper with typing into the computer can help them practice touch typing. It is skill of computer for typing more fast. Students who have good computer skill can also help them for their future in job. Many companies need employees who have computer skill. The person that has good computer skills has a big job opportunity in order that their skills are very useful to improve the productivity of a company. In short, students need to improve their computer skills.

In conclusion, computer give several help for the students. From social networking it help students to communicate with other, From learning process students use computer as learning media and use microsoft office programs to improve their skill in computer. I hope parents or teacher should still supervise and monitoring to avoid negative effect from computer