puykcyt
Jan 30, 2016
Undergraduate / A holistic education is best for me - USC Transfer essay #1 [5]
Hi, all! I had previously had this essay looked over at my college's writing studio, however, I decided to rework it almost completely. I still have finishing touches to make before I submit it but, this is the gist of the essay. Please nitpick it as I am concerned about clarity, support/evidence, and flow.I also feel like my opening sentence isn't very catching but, I'm unsure of how to fix it. The word count of the paper is 579 words. Thank you!
Please provide a statement that addresses your reasons for transferring and the objectives you hope to achieve.(250-650 words)
Encountering a new place is an inevitable occurrence in every person's life. For me, these occurrences have been somewhat frequent throughout life including my movement from High School to college and from my former college to my current college. While Georgia State University has allowed me to determine my career objectives, better my professional skills, and increase my appeal to employers I realize a change is needed to gain the holistic education I have long envisioned.
During my first year of college, I realized the importance of environment outside of the classroom has on academics and the full college experience. The ability to have both a varied but simultaneously tight-knit community with strong bonds and a competitive academic culture with a wealth of resources draws me to USC in my pursuit of becoming a civil rights lawyer.
I originally transferred to GSU from Oglethorpe University while citing the diversity of the student and faculty population at GSU as one of my deciding factors. Though this change was a large improvement for me compared to the 1000 students at Oglethorpe, the mostly in-state based student population has left something to be desired. In addition, this large student population is very divided between student and faculty. This would easily be rectified by the significant population of international students and significant minority student populations at USC and the overall diversity in the L.A. area.
Despite USC's large student body and high diversity, I noticed a familial atmosphere during my visits to campus. This atmosphere was made clearer to me in the connections made between students and faculty within their respective departments. In addition, the increased competitive nature of the campus the high amount of resources would be to my benefit. The availability of programs like that of the pre-law advising office, the political student assembly, and the trial advocacy program would all aid in preparing for law school and meeting my career goal of becoming a lawyer and improving my overall undergraduate experience.
I would like to take advantage of the applied political nature of USC's political science program to cover my areas of academic interest that my current school's research-based approach is not satisfying. The campus culture of USC combines the best elements of my former and current school - the liberal arts education of Oglethorpe and the large student population and resources of Georgia State while yielding a larger amount of both qualities.
Ideally, furthering my undergraduate journey would be to continue as Political Science major and economics minor. Upon graduating, I plan to attend law school to become a civil rights lawyer and serve the South Los Angeles area that my family hails from through public outreach and advocacy for reforms in compulsory education. With becoming part of the USC community receiving guidance in achieving this goal would be possible during my academic experience and after through the involved student and alumni community.
USC's strength in multiple areas, both academic and social, provide an environment geared toward bettering student's professionally and holistically. The intermeshing of the university's large, diverse and competitive population simultaneously with a deep set community that connects alumni and current students create a setting that encourages one to reach further than expected and provided the tools to do so. The rigor of academics and thought through a liberal arts format elevate the community aspect of the school in a way that can not only satisfy my desire for an unequaled education but go above that desire.
Hi, all! I had previously had this essay looked over at my college's writing studio, however, I decided to rework it almost completely. I still have finishing touches to make before I submit it but, this is the gist of the essay. Please nitpick it as I am concerned about clarity, support/evidence, and flow.I also feel like my opening sentence isn't very catching but, I'm unsure of how to fix it. The word count of the paper is 579 words. Thank you!
Please provide a statement that addresses your reasons for transferring and the objectives you hope to achieve.(250-650 words)
Encountering a new place is an inevitable occurrence in every person's life. For me, these occurrences have been somewhat frequent throughout life including my movement from High School to college and from my former college to my current college. While Georgia State University has allowed me to determine my career objectives, better my professional skills, and increase my appeal to employers I realize a change is needed to gain the holistic education I have long envisioned.
During my first year of college, I realized the importance of environment outside of the classroom has on academics and the full college experience. The ability to have both a varied but simultaneously tight-knit community with strong bonds and a competitive academic culture with a wealth of resources draws me to USC in my pursuit of becoming a civil rights lawyer.
I originally transferred to GSU from Oglethorpe University while citing the diversity of the student and faculty population at GSU as one of my deciding factors. Though this change was a large improvement for me compared to the 1000 students at Oglethorpe, the mostly in-state based student population has left something to be desired. In addition, this large student population is very divided between student and faculty. This would easily be rectified by the significant population of international students and significant minority student populations at USC and the overall diversity in the L.A. area.
Despite USC's large student body and high diversity, I noticed a familial atmosphere during my visits to campus. This atmosphere was made clearer to me in the connections made between students and faculty within their respective departments. In addition, the increased competitive nature of the campus the high amount of resources would be to my benefit. The availability of programs like that of the pre-law advising office, the political student assembly, and the trial advocacy program would all aid in preparing for law school and meeting my career goal of becoming a lawyer and improving my overall undergraduate experience.
I would like to take advantage of the applied political nature of USC's political science program to cover my areas of academic interest that my current school's research-based approach is not satisfying. The campus culture of USC combines the best elements of my former and current school - the liberal arts education of Oglethorpe and the large student population and resources of Georgia State while yielding a larger amount of both qualities.
Ideally, furthering my undergraduate journey would be to continue as Political Science major and economics minor. Upon graduating, I plan to attend law school to become a civil rights lawyer and serve the South Los Angeles area that my family hails from through public outreach and advocacy for reforms in compulsory education. With becoming part of the USC community receiving guidance in achieving this goal would be possible during my academic experience and after through the involved student and alumni community.
USC's strength in multiple areas, both academic and social, provide an environment geared toward bettering student's professionally and holistically. The intermeshing of the university's large, diverse and competitive population simultaneously with a deep set community that connects alumni and current students create a setting that encourages one to reach further than expected and provided the tools to do so. The rigor of academics and thought through a liberal arts format elevate the community aspect of the school in a way that can not only satisfy my desire for an unequaled education but go above that desire.
