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Intern. master degree appl. letter - clear goals, motives, qualifications, experiences and qualities



NOUNOU1989 1 / 1  
Feb 19, 2016   #1
the motivation letter have to contains theses major points:
1. Make your goal clear; provide a short preview of the rest of the letter;
2. Why do you think that the university and the Masters program are interesting and suitable for you? ;
3. Focus on some of your strongest qualifications, past experiences (international experiences are always relevant) and qualities; organize the middle paragraphs in terms of the qualifications most relevant for the program, you can also refer to your CV for more details;

4. Conclude by restating your interest and show appreciation for the chance to prove yourself in the letter.


I would like to know if my letter is corresponding to these points.

Dear Sirs, Madams,

I was very glad when I saw this particular opportunity to apply for an International Master program in Energy conversion and management and with this letter I would like to express my strong motivation for this master course.

First I would like to present myself, I am Nihed Mannai a young Tunisian energy and environmental engineering graduated in Jun 2013 from the National Engineering School of Monastir.

After I have succeeded in the national competitive exam for entry to engineering schools in the technology and physics section, I have chosen the energy engineering program course where I was able to get a solid knowledge in the field of Energy. Studying energy engineering has allowed me to be aware of the wide challenges that the energy field could provide beginning with the future energy supply challenge, then the need of alternatives sources of energy which should be sustainable and renewable and also the major problem of pollution and the CO2 emission that put our planet in a real danger.

IN November 2014 I took training in the field of energy efficiency and renewable energy. It was in the framework of the clean production Tunisian project and in the cooperation with the ONUDI, the Swiss State Secretariat, SOFIES and the Tunisian International Centre for Environmental Technologies. This experience gave me the chance to learn in practice how to apply methods to reduce the energy consumption and improve energy economics and so, I was able to perceive the complexity of this field, and to realize that I would like to develop my career in this area.

In order to attempt my career goals I have chosen to apply for Energy Conversion and management master program, because it really suits my intentions to be a specialist in the field of energy efficiency and management. Also I really like its module system of study. I specially appreciate the wide range of offered modules. Many of the modules offered are unique for me, because there is no equivalent at my home university. Very important for me also is the internship provided during the program because it offered me the unique opportunity of an international experience in German industries. The third main reason why I have chosen this master program is the fact that during this program we don't only study the energy field but also we take the relevant economics social and political environment into consideration and that makes it very unique, global and interesting program.

After careful overview of the master program you are offering with at your University, I believe that curricula fully suit my intentions, and therefore I would like to get an opportunity to attend this program.

At the end I would like to point out that I am determined to make the most of this opportunity. I believe that being a student in your department would not only empower my career development, but would give me the framework to utilize my full potentials. Moreover I feel that as a Masters student at your University, I can benefit from the numerous challenging career opportunities.

Once again I am grateful for considering my application and I look forward to a favorable reply.

Sincerely,

aniani 20 / 19  
Feb 19, 2016   #2
Hello Nihed, let me give feedback, comment, and correction on your essay.

1. For the words (Energy conversion and management) , It would be better if you use capital letter for the first letter. (Energy Conversion and Management)

2. Energy C onversion and M anagement(FULLSTOP)and with(In) this letter(COMMA) I would like to express my strong motivation for this master course.

First(Firstly)(COMMA) I would like to present myself, I am Nihed Mannai(COMMA) a young Tunisian energy and environmental engineering(engineer) (who) graduated in Jun 2013 from the National Engineering School of Monastir.

NOTE : In the second of my correction, you have to pay attention on your punctuation and differ the function of noun . Such as engineering and engineer .

3. Studying energy engineering has (been) allowed me to be aware (...) could provide beginning(earlier) with the future energy supply challenge(FULLSTOP)then(Then) the need of alternatives sources of energy(energy sources) which should be sustainable and renewable(FULLSTOP)and(Moreover)(COMMA) (it) also (be) the major problem of pollution ...

4. IN(In) November 2014(COMMA) I took training in the field of ...
... to learn in practice how to apply (a number of) methods to reduce the energy consumption and improve energy economics(COMMA)and so(NO COMMA) I was able to perceive ...

5. In order to attempt my career goals(COMMA) I have chosen ... Also I (am also) really (keen on)like its module system of study ... Many of the modules (that is) offered are unique for me, because ... Very(Another) (importance)important for me also is the internship provided during the program because(since) it offered me the unique ...

... during this program we don't(do not) only study the energy field(COMMA) but also we take (...) into consideration and that(which) makes it very unique...

NOTE : Try to avoid repetition in one paragraph.

6. After (read)careful(carefully) overview of the master program (that) you are offering with at your University,

7. At the end(FInally)(COMMA) I would like to point out ...
... would not only empower my career development, but (also) would give me the framework ... Moreover(COMMA) I feel that as a Masters ...

Good luck for your Master Degree! Keep struggle! :-)
OP NOUNOU1989 1 / 1  
Feb 19, 2016   #3
Thank you very much for your help aniani :)


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