Please help me! i'm not expert English man. so check out my assignment and correct to rewrite if there any wrong
Hi Rupy, May I ask where is your assignment? I'm not an expert too but I'd love to help you out :)
this is my assignment, plz check it
I am Asaduzzaman, graduated Bangladeshi citizen. I have been admitted to the professional program in Fire Protection Engineering Technology (FPT) at Seneca Collage in Toronto. I would like to have resident permit in Canada for the duration of my program.
Canada is regarded to be one the countries for providing globally recognized high quality education. Canada, a polyglot country, which is a platform to give me the opportunity to get exposure to enriched cultural diversity. From compare to other countries, Canadian educational institutes have excellent facilities and faculties and the campus lifestyle is a great attraction for as well. I have chosen Fire Protection Engineering Technology (FPT) as my professional course in Seneca Collage. Seneca's FPT program is one of the leading North American programs for fire protection engineering.
From an early age, I was dreamed about to be an engineer, keep this in mind, I have completed my graduation in Electrical and Electronics Engineering (EEE) from United International University (UIU). In addition, I now intend to study overseas, which I have been dreaming for a very long time. I want to go highest position in my professional career. Nevertheless, in my social-economic system (condition), it is also difficult to move further in the profession sector without any profession or international level or form. For which I would need an internationally recognize professional degree. Whatever, I have chosen Fire Protection Engineering Technology (FPT) as my profession program, which is very valuable of our country. Moreover, I am intending to use my potentials to compete with international students and thus want to avail the chance to sharpen my skills and abilities to compete in the international arena. Moreover, I want to bring Canadian technology and educational knowledge to secure from insecure fire and to progress my country.
Professional engineering program in Bangladesh is my first choice, but there are not too many educational institutes, which offer this course, which I want to study. Only few Universities have included the course in their study programs. However, this program is being offered in my country as well, but there is surely difference in the standards of education and infrastructure there. Therefore, pursuing a similar degree in my country of residence at the present time might create an obstacle to my future career. In addition, I want to study in a class with diverse population and learn a new culture. Cultural awareness surely helps differentiate people within a workforce.
Bangladesh is now developing quite fast in the industrial sector. Due to the growth of industrialization, my country needs more engineers with up to date industrial and technological knowledge. Through this program, I can be able to achieve knowledge of fire alarming configure, fire protection software, alarming coding, in addition to training in advanced design and hand on practice designed by industry. There are many manufacturers and factories; even residential building burns out in every instant. Therefore, international degree on the base of fire protection gives me the best opportunity to get high status job facility. In addition, by completing this program, I enhance my academic background and place myself in a secure job in my country.
I am a Bangladeshi citizen by born. I have been raised up in my country. The scent of my country is combined with my vain. I hold solid family and friendship ties here. All of my allies and family member love me a great deal. Though I have an older sis who is married and lives with husband, but I am the elder son of my parents, and bear a younger brother who is a scholar. Therefore, It's my duty to take guardianship of them. Besides that, there is some business of my father those needed to be taken charge of. In addition, this country gives me more, the time has come to return it back and I want to serve my country as a successful man.
Rupy, your essay is too long and offers too much unnecessary information. This is an essay that should only be 5 paragraphs long. Here is a format by which you can write this essay for your reference:
1. Think about the reasons that you want to study in Canada, list them down in order to importance.
2. Pick the top 5 reasons. Add more information about each reason that will help defend your choice of a Canadian education.
3. Outline the essay per topic.
4. Develop your introductory paragraph based upon the collective reasons your listed down. Give a rundown of the reasons you want attend a Canadian school.
5. Develop your concluding paragraph by explaining how the Canadian education will help you further advance your career.
That is the guide question for the basic essay. Now, tell me if you are writing an application letter for a masters education. If you are, then that is a totally new set of instructions :-)
i will try but no pint come in my head.
r u help me to re-write it?
plz correction my plan
plz
next week i'll submit all of my doc in Canadian embassy
i'll wait for ur response
Rupy, we are not here to write the essay for you. You need to write the essay yourself and we will help you fix it and make it ready for submission to the embassy. if that is what you need. Don't panic, take your time and consider all of the instructions that I provided you as a guideline. Try to write something down. It does not matter if it is grammatically imperfect, we are here to help you fix that. This is something that you have to write yourself otherwise the people who read it will know if you had someone else write it for you. Also, this forum was not created as a professional writing service. We are merely offering free editing, review, and revision advice to students who need our help. Our job is to guide you towards creating the essay paper that you need or require. The job of writing the content, is yours :-)
So write something, whatever comes to your mind after reading the guidelines I mentioned. Then post it here. Don't be ashamed if you feel that it is not any good. We will be here to help you make it better or the best that it can be. You have to do the work though :-) Again, don't panic, relax and know that we will help you get through this. Nothing will be accomplished if you choose to panic instead of work on the paper :-) Work on it and let us help you instead.
plz help me to re write
Rupy, since you already wrote some sort of draft for this assignment, I guess that can be used as the basis of helping you to revise this essay. The main reason that it is hard to help you at the moment, is that you did not tell us what the assignment is about. What is the essay prompt? How are you expected to answer it? What information is necessary to present in the essay? Right now, we cannot decide how to best help you because we don't have any guidelines for reviewing your paper. Once you upload the necessary information, I am sure that we can help you revise your essay. Remember though,we will not write the paper for you. We will only advice you regarding the methods by which you can clean up the problems of your paper. The actual writing is still your job :-)
