THE BOY IS GOOD AT ALL - Essay scholarship for a 10-grade student.

the scholarship of Birmingham International Collegiate of Canada

"The boy is good at all"-That is the title of a passage of writing about me in the "Typical Teens 2019 of Ho Chi Minh City" book. I am quite proud of myself when I was one of the 49 typical teens of the city mentioned in that book. But I have 2 questions: First is "Am I really good at all?" and Second is "Why should I get the scholarship of Birmingham International Collegiate of Canada?".

I am now a 16-year-old boy. Although I have an undersized body, I am always filled with the enthusiasm of youth. I am the kind of person who is keen on going everywhere to discover the unique things around, so I have attended community activities since 8 years ago. With the thought of childish then, I just wanted to take part in community activities to be going around. But increasingly I am interested in social activities more because I can care and help the children Who are the orphan and terminally ill. Thereby, I feel respectable and obliged for my life. From 10-15 years old, I was in the Ho Chi Minh Young Pioneer Organization, Which is the largest child organization in Vietnam. During that period, I actively participated in contests, camps, ... and gained many awards. Especially, I won two best prizes and one third in " Young Pioneer Commander's Got Talent" Contest (This is a contest that helps children show talent, spirit, leadership and survival skills) in three consecutive years. At the end of the children's age, I was nominated as The Young Typical Citizen of Ho Chi Minh City Award in 2019. Currently, I am in Ho Chi Minh Communist Youth Union And I am an organizer of the organizing committee for the traditional camping of my high school.

"Be unique, Be a star" is a keyword talked about my point of view. I know that everyone has the stars to be idols, maybe a singer, actor, writer, model, ... But, In my opinion, the person we should idol is ourselves. Because we always desire to be better or equal to our idols, so If we idolize ourselves, we will overcome ourselves. I always consider myself a unique star, so I can idol myself and get better every day.

As the creation and artistic lover, I can sing, dance, cook, design, ... Birmingham International Collegiate of Canada is a great choice for me to help me develop my talent as well as skills, especially leadership skills. Because I want to study abroad to experience a new education environment so that I do not have to depend too much on my parents, this scholarship is very essential to me, it proves to my parents that I have grown and been able to look for good opportunities for my life. If I have this scholarship, I will learn hard, actively participate in school activities and camps.

The two questions above I could not answer myself but I believe you can answer through What I have shared about myself. Thank you!
#Beunique
#Bestar

Never hashtag your academic essays. You are not writing an Instagram description nor are you Tweeting a message. You are to write an academic essay without any useless hashtags. The reviewers could care less about the hashtags you use. It does not help define you. It does not help move the essay forward. It does not serve a purpose. It was never included in the prompt requirements, so there is no need for you to use it in this academic paper.

I am really unsure as to what two questions you are trying to respond to in this essay. Your rephrasing of the two prompt statements left only one of them clear. The second one about why you would make a good candidate for the Canadian college. I wish you had included the original prompts with your post. It would have helped direct my review of your work.

As of now, what I can tell you is that the content you have presented is confusing. I am not sure if it is because of the improper grammar or, maybe it is just because I am unsure of the relevance of the information you are presenting to the first prompt requirement. Reviewing the essay further has convinced me that you need professional editing help for this essay. Just so you can be sure that your essay is understandable to the reviewer.

Now, you do have unique qualifications that might be considered assets when reviewed with your application. However, the presentation is problematic. You use creative writing in the essay but do not achieve the imaginative presentation of who you are that you hoped to convey to the reviewer. If you had simply responded directly to the essay prompt, without trying to wax poetic about who you are, the essay would have been more useful towards your application.