Hello reader, I'm applying for a Chevening Scholarship and will be grateful to get feedback from my networking essay. Thank you.
the value of networking
As a teacher, being involved with quite a number of parents, going for workshops, symposia, inter-schools competition, among others, create room for networking for me. With this, I have gained a wide knowledge about both education systems and teaching skills from networking.
My first teaching experience was in the year 2012 when I was posted to Christ the King International School to do my national service after my Bachelor's degree. I met with different parents from different backgrounds yet I could relate with each and every one of them in a professional way which earned me a lot of friends among them through which I had a very good job for my junior brother right after his national service. After my national service, I was fully employed as a teacher in the school. I was then made the adult leader of the Girl Guides Club for the lower primary which is the Ananse Guide. Every year, other colleagues in other schools and I organize camping for the girls. This made me got to know a lot of people from different school which I believe gave an opportunity to one of the girls from my school win an award to tour Scotland. I only had to inform the organisers she had always been part of the campers. This is because most of the organisers knew me as one of the adult leaders who train the young girls at the camping centre. In the process, I ended up creating new network because the organisers I knew, spoke so well of me to the unknown ones which made them got in touch with me whenever there was going to be a special event for the Guides.
During my MSc Economics course, I happened to be in the same class with a Member of Parliament in Ghana who became so fond of me just because of my handwriting and my attitude towards work in class. When he got to know I was a teacher, not long after completing the course, I was employed by him to give an extra tuition to his wards at home after they close from school. This gave me an opportunity to meet other Members of Parliament and other high profile members of government since they do meet for discussion in his house often. He needed an extra teacher and I quickly recommended one of my colleagues from work who was employed by him to do the same work as me. This gave both of us some extra income.
From all these usefulness of networking, I believe that I have strong networking skills and I'm always ready to help as the motto of the Ananse Guide goes for members in the Chevening Community to be lead in their chosen profession.
@Quizzy
Hi there! Thanks for being in the forum. Hopefully, the feedback I'll give you will somehow help you ease your worries about your application. If you do learn something from the essay, don't hesitate to reach out!
Firstly, I find that the introductory paragraph is sufficient. What primarily concerns me are the latter portions, especially the second paragraph. When it comes to creating lengthier content, you seem to have a little of difficulty in making the compositions structured. I recommend that you review fundamental rules related to writing Try to compose with more certainty on the punctuation marks and such.
The flow of writing can also be improved by managing better the way that you story tell. With the third paragraph, I find that about half of the entire composition is irrelevant data. These are unnecessary parts of the essay that you could have gone better without. Try to be more open and engaging - this will surely give you more benefits in the long-run.
