Chinese language, research, publications... Study plan for China`s Governmental Scholarship

hi everyone )
i am applying to a china`s governmental scholarship program! so i was aked to write study plan!
this is just draft but how do you think, is it ok if i`ll continue writing in this way? and should i add info about academic background?

Now I want to represent my study plan.

-Studying Chinese language.

` The more you know, the better you are` Learning Chinese will be one of my priorities. A language of more than billion people can bring me a lot of opportunities and benefits.

-Study hard.

As I have mentioned above, education plays important role in my life. Since early childhood I was told that person can be described by an education he got. During my studies I will try to get possibly highest marks. I will prepare for my lessons with big concentration and inspiration. I will communicate with my professor in case of improving my weaknesses. I will submit all necessary works by deadline and read a lot of Chinese and foreign literature in case of broaden mind

-Research.

It is a fact that China today plays important and leading role in international trade. Its economy is fast growing and near to be super power. It has the lowest rate of corruption and violence. These are some things which makes china interesting for me to research . I want to focus more on China`s economical history and international relations. And , as a Citizen of post-Soviet union country citizen, I will make some researches in area of relations with these countries. Moreover , I want to make a research of China`s influence on world economy.

-Publications.

Preparing publications will develop my analytical skills and critical thinking, I will do as much as possible publications in 2 years. I am looking for journals with high impact factor.

-Internship.

China is acountry of clooming opportunities for young specialists like me. It has uncountable numbers of enterpreneurships and organizations. Internship is the most effective way of putting theory into practice. Internship is `must to do ` thing in China. I will be happy to intern in a company or governmental organization . I want to learn some skills from Chinese people and see the way they work.

-Cultural exchange.

It is necessary to keep balance between studies and personal life. China is country with a lot of nations . I am looking for communicating with different people all over the world and make an exchange of skills, habits and culture. Studying in china is a brilliant chance of making it.

-Discover China.

I remember my first time watching cartoon `Moulan` about a Chinese girl-warrior. I promised myself that one day I will go to China and see this beautfil nature, climb mountains and the Great Wall of China. China is a unique place, where old correlates with modern.It has the oldest history in the world, it`s made a meaningful contributions to a developing of the whole world, the inventions which were made in China are still useful. All of these factors influence to me and I want to discover China by myself. To see its nature and feel it`s traditions.

Dina, when you are asked to write a study plan, this is similar to the presentation of a research paper that you would like to write or have published as the culmination of your academic study in China. This should be the expansion of the motivation that you have for wishing to study in China rather than anywhere else in the world. For this essay, I can see that the topic of your study plan must center around 2 activities.

The first, is the research that you want to do about the history and reason for the low graft and corruption rate in China. Over the time that you are a student, you can do research about this by presenting a proper thesis statement and methodology for your research, with a hypothetical result indicated. The other part of your study plan, will be to develop this research in such a manner that it will pass for publication in international journals. These are the two most impressive study plan that you can present to your reviewer.

Do not add academic information to this essay. The presentation of your information should only cover your desired line of research which will be supported by you academic learning during the 4-7 years that you will be in China.

@Holt
Dear Holt, thank you for your useful advice! This is the second time when you really help me to have a chance of winning scholarship! I love you <3

This is my draft , and according to your advice i really tried to cut all unnecessary things but the essay is still looking unsatisfied. please can u read this one time and tell me which parts should i cut and which develop?P.S. i think of wiritng about promoting China in KZ as the last sentence.

Stay hungry. Stay foolish. That is a secret of success and triumphs. In our highly competitive century it is necessary to be educated, strong motivated and hardworking. Recognizing this truth by 15, I am still trying to create a better future for myself.

My name is Dina, I am 21 years old . I am a Bachelor`s student at Eurasian National University after L.N.Gumiylev.Because my interests lays in area of political science, management , international relations, urban studies, I choosed a major that correlates the knowledge of all these areas. My major is ` State and local administration`. During my studies , i tried hard to get the possibly highest marks. Moreovere, I volunteered and worked at different governmental forums and conferences I order to develop necessary skills. * names of conferences* In addition, I made researches to obtain some academic tools.Now I can be ranked as top 10 students of my faculty.

Since early childhood, I was told that person can be described by an education he got. So, I do not want to finish my study with one degree, I want to continue studying Master`s Degree. As Master`s Degree usually concentrates on one specific and exact area I think that enrolling Master`s will play a big role in becoming a competitive professional. Because my major has a deepen focus on economics and administration, choosing country of my future degree was not difficult. I truly believe that China, today`s great power country, can equip me with perfect environment to develop my skills and to get specific knowledge. I am amazed by hardworking skills of Chinese people and their effort they put into creating a country with fast growing economy and technology. And , of course, I am charmed by an old history of this country.

My main priorities of studying in China is to make researches and write publications. I will focus on China`s economical history, and international relations. According to my research, I will concentrate on China`s economical indexes , trade , entrepreneurships and budget. It is a fact that China is a leader in Asia , and my motherland Kazakhstan can learn a lot from it. I want to recognize the differences between China`s and Kazakhstan`s economical policy. * I will add more themes to research*

To make it possible I will make some rules for myself;
-Get the possibly highest marks and communicate with professors in case of improving my weaknesses
-Never limit myself with literature I will be given during lessons, but to read other foreign books and papers
-Always be concentrated
-Find an internship. Internship is the greatest way of putting theory into practice and improve yourself, develop skills and prepare yourself as a young specialist.

-Join university clubs in order to refresh my mind and generate new ideas.
I have no doubt that university will meet all my educational criteria and will help me to do as much research as possible in 2 years.

After finishing master`s Degree in China I am planning to immediately starting working . I will be happy to work in any governmental or international organization, which deals with politics and economy. Because I will be enjoying my work and try to work better . I want to make a meaningful contribution to developing not only my country , but also the whole world. I understand that to do this I need a long experience, that I will fall sometimes, fail. But another thing that I know is that I will never give up. I will use my knowledge and never stop learning something new. I will be happy to make China`s and Kazakhstan`s relations more friendly.

Dina, there is only one part of this essay that can actually be used as the basis of your study plan. It is the paragraph that start with:

My main priorities of studying in China is to make researches and write publications. ... I want to recognize the differences between China`s and Kazakhstan`s economical policy.

This is the point where you actually began to develop a thesis statement for presentation in your study plan. Unfortunately, the parts of the essay before and after this section are not relevant nor appropriate for a study plan. Using the information I picked out for you, you must now develop your actual thesis statement, method of research, and expected outcome of your research. The closing paragraph should explain how you hope that your time as a student at this university will help you to develop a credible research paper that, after publication, will help all nations to improve in this particular sector. Those are the only necessary and required information for a study plan. What you have at the moment doesn't really reflect the correct method of "studies" outside of the classroom. The study plan has to reflect your continued academic learning even after school hours. The research paper is the best and continuous way to do that.