250-500 word count
Essay 1 Peace Corps service presents major physical, emotional, and intellectual challenges. You have provided information on how you qualify for Peace Corps service elsewhere in the application.
I come from a family of strong, motivated, dedicated individuals. I appreciate the importance of economic success, but to me wealth is very different. People and relationships captivate me; the happiest points in my life have not been defined by money, but by the people I love and with whom I could share my generosity. I am intelligent, driven, thoughtful, dedicated to humanity and crave the opportunity to share these qualities to benefit others.
I realize being able to prioritize the people in my life above financial security is a privilege and speaks to all I have been given. I live in a nation where my family and I were blessed with education, health care, and countless opportunities for success. Living in Ghana taught me just how different life could be. There are serious disparities internationally. Where you are born contributes significantly to your values, culture, and interests, but it should not decide the quality of your life. I am motivated to give everything I can to people who have experienced the suffering of inequality.
There would be laborious work - assessing, planning, building, and maintaining infrastructure and projects - but that would not be my sole occupation. I would constantly be working to overcome prejudices both of and by Americans. Our perspectives are powerful, a broad perspective lays the bricks for tolerance, influences relationships, and has the potential to shape policy. Maya Angelou explains the sentiment flawlessly, "perhaps travel cannot prevent bigotry, but by demonstrating that all people cry, laugh, eat, worry, and die, it can introduce the idea that if we try and understand each other, we may even become friends." Jobs are a means for living, and when there is an opportunity to take a job and improve others' lives with friendship and opportunity, that is a purpose for living.
There will be barriers in any site I enter, but I am confident that with sincerity and sensitivity I will be accepted. I appreciate cultural differences and am content adopting diverse lifestyles. I don't expect the assimilation to be effortless, but I yearn for the challenge to understand others' values and lifestyles. Living in Ghana, I attempted to learn traditional Ghanaian dance. This was not because I am a wonderful dancer and knew this would be an easy in - I was unfortunately never blessed with such grace - so the whole process was painfully embarrassing, but it succeeded in proving I wanted to be there. I wanted to be a part of the local life and be involved in their traditions.
I want to use my abilities - to connect with people, to organize, to problem-solve - to confront the inequality so many of my peers are afraid to acknowledge. I love the world I was born in to and I want other people in the world to be able to feel that same love.
Essay 2 Describe an experience you have had in living or working in a social or cultural environment different from your own. What specific challenges did you face concerning trust, confidence, and/or integration? What did you learn from this experience that you will bring with you to your Peace Corps service?
Life is a constant process of transformation, self-assessment, and adaptation. Each time we move to a new place, start a new school or find a new job we are encountering different environments, social situations, and cultures to which we integrate ourselves. My junior year of college I chose to study abroad for a semester at University of Ghana in Legon, Ghana. There I entered a vastly different culture, environment, and social dynamic where I would be going to school and working at an orphanage. There, every aspect of my person aside from my physical being and the clothes I packed was essentially unrecognizable.
I'd had a good life, I realized not more than a few weeks after arriving. At home, I expected constant water, electricity, public bathrooms with toilet paper, accessible internet, maintenance of facilities, customer service, and other commonplace facets of American life. In Ghana, these things became infrequent, inconsistent, or entirely absent. It took time to adapt to the absence of these amenities, but it wasn't impossible. I just had to relax and focus on other externalities that were in my control.
Upon entering a different national, ethnic, and cultural repertoire, every little gesture impacted how I was received, and sensitivity was crucial. Using my left hand was apparently unacceptable, and so I made a conscious effort to only use the right, which is harder than it sounds! I made more of an effort to wave hello (with my right hand) when walking place to place, to avoid the cold shouldered everyday American interaction I was used to, but Ghanaians were not.
Ghanaians always seemed happy. At first it was mystifying to me how so many people with so little were so content, but as soon as I relaxed in to this new pace of life, it was clear. When there is so much out of your control, you focus on what you can. I learned to dance. I loved the spice. I baked in the sun and let the sweat drip down my back. I dismissed pride and really enjoyed the food, the people, and the lifestyle.
By embracing every aspect of Ghanaian life, it was easy to incorporate myself in the culture and appreciate it. I was able to understand the difference between luxuries I had known that had initially seemed essential to provide and what was true necessity. It is this kind of adaptation that is essential for a Peace Corps volunteer to make any real difference and something I am prepared to do. Respectful and sincere integration gains trust, and for good reason. Being a part of a community gives you the perspective you need to make notable and lasting changes. It gives others confidence in you to know what is good and what is not. As a Peace Corps volunteer I am not only prepared, but also enthusiastic about the chance to involve myself in a community and appreciate their tradition and their needs so I can truly make a difference.
"share these qualities to benefit others" sounds a bit awkward. Maybe drop "to benefit others".
nice use of "disparities"
consider changing "who have experienced the suffering of inequality" to the present tense "who are experiencing" or "who are suffering from this inequality"
"Our perspectives are powerful, a broad perspective lays the bricks for tolerance, influences relationships, and has the potential to shape policy." Not sure on this one but maybe a semicolon rather than a comma after powerful?
"flawlessly" should be followed by a phrase to introduce the quote "Maya Angelou explained the sentiment flawlessly when she said/stated/whatever 'quote'"
When you talk about jobs, perhaps you could mention that the happiest are those who derive pleasure from their jobs and do not just regard them as necessary to make money.
possible comma after sensitivity
change to "content to adopt to"
"this was not because I am a" includes past and present tense
consider parallel structure alternative " but it succeeded in proving that I wanted to be there, wanted to be a part of the local life, and wanted to be involved in their traditions."
"I want to use my abilities - to connect with people, to organize, to problem-solve - to confront the inequality" improper use of -. rewrite to "I want to use my abilities to connect with people, to organize, to problem-solve, and to confront the inequality"
Consider " I love the world I was born in to and I want others to be able to feel that same love."
All in all, nice essay.
