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How computers change our working conditon?



lacusclyne 16 / 23  
Nov 6, 2015   #1
Looking back at mankind history, the Stone Age and Industrialized Age progressively passed leaving behind "inventions" that served as stepping stones for various humankind's historical turning points. And now comes the most anticipated era, the Information Age, an age which is marked by the appearance of the very first electronic general-purpose computer, ENIAC, an age in which computing-the science of cultivating complex capabilities into computers is on the upward trajectory, an age in which computers have greatly revolutionized every facet of our lives, and the most resilient changes could be spotted in current, not to mention the future, working scenario

In order to illustrate this point, we should point our scope into the working environment of factories. Prior to 20th century, even with the newly born diesel and steam engines, production requires the strength of hundred men-or so we call the wage earners and in the face of a huge economic recession in which demand far outstripped supply, unskilled workforce such as children was also involved. Only by looking at the working condition of this time could we really marvel at how drastic a degree have computers changed the way we work. In our time, computers have nearly replaced the standard labor force with a machinery one, rendering factories humming with the sound of mechanical, computer-operating arms. Workers do virtually nothing except for supervising the process. Just imagine that even with such narrow understanding about computer science could bring us this far, then it should not be difficult to visualize the images of future factories. Expanding our view to professional careers, computers have allowed process to be carried out perfectly without making any fatal miscalculations. For instance, the implementation of nanotechnology in medication may promise us a tantalizing prospect in which micro drones are injected into patients' body and via computers doctor can control the movement of these drones to "fix" any abnormalities. Such prospect would mean that surgical procedure could be operated with submillimeter accuracy rendering the patients free of sequel effects without using much time and "mind power".

Another point worth stating out is that computers and social network have opened up a whole new era, the era of "telecommute" in which men, as the tiniest spots of the universe, are nominated into the dominators of nature who could "traverse" through the vast distances which originally could only be crossed by planes or other transports. Also at this point evolve the term "Nomad workers" referring to workers who do not necessarily go to their traditional workplace to work, they could literally work, attend a conference taking place in other countries, communicate with their colleagues anywhere they they like as long as strong internet connection is sustainable.

All things considered, the infiltration of computers into people's lives has truly revolutionized our working condition, eased off the pressure placed on each individual while improving the efficacy of working process. Moreover, thanks to such invention, workers can now be more flexible in the jobs, become proactive in the schedule, and thus, more degree of self-contentment could be achieved.

I know that this essay may contain many errors because of my inexperience. Please evaluate it and check grammatical errors. Thank you!!!

justivy03 - / 2265  
Nov 6, 2015   #2
Loung, first of all, it will help if you have the prompt posted here on EF too. It will help us properly evaluate your prompt and answer the question if you were able to answer the prompt given.

I'd like to take your essay one paragraph at a time.

1st paragraph
- Looking back at the history of mankind history ,
- as stepping stones for various humankind's historical turning points.
- AndN ow comes the most anticipated era,

2nd paragraph
- we should point our scopeI'd like to turn into the working environment of factories.
- how a drastic a degree have computers changed the way we work.
- with a machinery one, rendering factories

Loung, this is my initial remarks on your essay, what I notice here is your word use, you seem to place them in the wrong post or order in your sentences.

I'll get back to you for the rest of the essay.
justivy03 - / 2265  
Nov 6, 2015   #3
Loung, this are my remarks for the rest of your essay.

3rd paragraph
- Another point worth stating out is that computers
- as the tiniest spots of the universe( this phrase is not necessary ) ,
- are nominated into as the dominators of nature who could "traverse"
- AlsoA t this point evolve the term evolve "Nomad workers"
- colleagues anywhere they they like as long as strong internet connection is sustainable.

Final paragraph
- eased off the pressure placed on each individual
- while improving the efficacy of the working process.
- workers can now be more flexible in their jobs,
- become proactive in theproductive and following their own schedule, and thus,
- more degree of self-contentment could beis achieved.

Loung, as you can see there's still a lot of work to be done for the last and final paragraph in your essay, however as I said there's always a room for improvement.

I hope my remarks helped.


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