By far the biggest challenge I faced in adolescence that greatly shaped my personality occurred in England. In order to improve my English language proficiency I joined summer courses in Alexanders International School (AIS). At that time I was very shy, extremely unsociable, homely girl, who had never left parental supervision. I could not speak in front of the public and could not stand being in the limelight. In addition to timid personality, I had a loose command of English language. That is why leaving hometown without any attendant was a real trial for me.
During departure I could not help crying; various thoughts bothered my mind. Luckily, I got to England without any troubles and managed to find school representative easily. The school was truly international; it had students from all the geographic spectrums. However, upon arrival to campus I found out that I was the only girl from Central Asia. Many students spoke similar languages, while others came with groups. Most of them seemed to be familiar with each other. And there was me - a girl from Kazakhstan unnoticed by anybody. Shaken by cultural shock I felt lonely and miserable. I got homesick by the end of the first day and thought about my family who send me there to improve my knowledge, skills, personality. Then I suddenly realized that I am obliged to take every advantage of this journey so that my parents' endeavors would not be in vain. I got the idea that being out of my comfort zone gives me an opportunity to challenge myself, strengthen my strong points and improve my weaknesses. Thuswise, I strung myself up to talking with others and being engaged in school activities, games that involved active interaction instead of sobbing in room. Initially I had troubles not only in understanding other students because each of them had different accent and speed, but also in speaking foreign language constantly. Step by step I got used to it and ultimately found myself participating in each and every event unconsciously. As a result of being sociable, I acquired array of international friends with whom I am still in touch. After getting to know them better I surprisingly discovered that notwithstanding different nationality, confession, race, color people across the globe are generally similar. We are all equal human beings who strive to be happy. Noticing my eager desire to improve my language skills, teachers transferred me to advanced class level. When the day of my departure arrived dozen of my new friends came to bade me farewell.
Only on the way to home I realized how this trip strongly influenced me. Returning to home with a good command of English, I no more suffered from diffidence and became self-confident and easygoing. Now I am very grateful to my parents for providing me with opportunity to achieve my full potential. Overcoming this challenge altered my life dramatically and opened new borders for future improvement.
Quick fixes:
"I could not speak in front of the public"
"easily find the school representative easily "
"Many students spoke similar languages, while others came with groups." Sounds awkward, maybe change to "but they came in groups"
"my family who sendsent me there"
Once in a while, you seem to switch between past and present tense during your story, so just make sure all your tenses match there. Overall, you have a pretty good essay. I would recommend spending a little more time focusing on what you learned from the experience, how it all benefitted you and made you evolve as an individual.
Good luck!:)
