In five years after my scholarship, I would reach higher managerial level in my country. Chevening

Please I need your help to evaluate my essay and to check is it relevant to the Chevening parameter or not, please comment, correct and rephrase if needed. Thanks in Advance.

Post career question: Chevening is looking for individuals who have a clear post-study career plan. Please outline your immediate plans upon returning home and your longer term career goals. You may wish to consider how these relate to what the UK government is doing in your country.

carrer in Egypt plan

Egypt, among other countries worldwide, owns different resources that are unfortunately not effectively used or utilized to reach the required development.
In that light, my immediate plan after Chevening Scholarship would be to start my career as an effective marketer. First, I would like to gain a real work experience for a year in one of the top ranked companies where I could use my gained knowledge, practice my new abilities and skills. Also, I could meet experts in Marketing field so I can obtain advises related to the Egyptian market.

This year would give me the confidence to apply for the government in Tourism Ministry. I believe that my abilities and advanced knowledge gained through my studies and my work experience would extremely help to provide new thoughts, concepts and perception in that field. As per reports, Egypt owns one-third of the world's monuments, in addition to very attractive places but unfortunately, they are not well presented. I am sure that I would be able to provide accurate plans and new ideas to correctly exploited this treasure through using my gained marketing skills in several directions. I would start with conducting trainings and workshops for the employees to share all what I have of experience, knowledge and skills acquired through my studies in UK and the professional life. So, I would be able to change the methodology followed and applied in this place and apply the new concept, in order to show the beauty of my country and attract more tourists to visit and enjoy the Egyptian civilization's history.

That would incredibly help for the nation's growth as tourism plays a key role in the country's revenues. Therefore, this would lead to economy development, and that's exactly aligned with what UK government is offering to my community through the projects and programs provided in several areas.

Accordingly, in five years after my scholarship, I would reach higher managerial level in my country so I will be more responsible to continuously offer extra plans, campaigns and projects to successfully reach the ultimate goal that I am always seeking to achieve, the community and the country's growth.

'First, I would like to gain a real work experience for a year in one of the top ranked companies where I could use my gained knowledge, practice my new abilities and skills.'

Hi Mariam. I believe you should be a bit specific here. Which top-ranked companies do you have in mind? I think it'd be best if you list a few names as it'd give an impression that you've properly researched about the places you wish to work at in future.

Also, it's unclear whether you want to work with the public sector or the private sector. I think that you should think about one concrete post-study career plan and then build on that. Right now, the essay is very ambiguous. Also, put in as many details as you can. Don't write generic statements. Good luck!

Hi Mariam. Your long career plan only cover 5 years after the scholarship. Add some text explaining where you see yourself as a professional in longer term career.

Mariam, you can't just say that your plans for tourism development in Egypt is aligned with the UK government interests in your country. You must justify this claim by naming the agency involved, what the project is, and how that ties in with your own post study plans. The interests of the UK in your country should become the same as your interests for your country. The two need to become symbiotic in a way. One plan cannot exist without the other. So, why your earlier plans are solid, you may need to adjust the presentation of those plans in order to allow room to discuss a more solid project that the UK is promoting in your country that you can help with. Explain how you will come in to help the UK project and how you hope to make a difference in Egypt as a member of that project team. Remember, the UK project needs to be presented in at least half of the paper content because it is a prompt requirement. It cannot be implied nor simply mentioned in passing. It needs to be a developed plan.

@Raza93
@gmeigo9
@Holt

I will consider your comments and will re-write my essay, then will post it here to get your feedback again.
Thank you so much.

@Holt

Many thanks Mary for efforts and support. I have considered your feedback and re-wrote the essay, please check it and give me your valuable comments. Than You :)

Mariam, the conversation with the British ambassador does not represent any UK supported project in your country that can tie in directly with your chosen major and potential future career. That is an extremely long but useless paragraph. The reviewer has no direct interest in the data that you are presenting. He is only concerned with how you can justify being sponsored for the scholarship based upon the interests of the UK government in your country. As such, you need actual UK supported projects to represent in the third paragraph. Remember, the post study plan needs to show how you can repay the kindness of the UK government when they sponsored you as a Chevening scholar. These projects that they have in your country that you can assist in further developing is one way of payback for their kindness. Try to find that project. Without it, you will definitely not get this scholarship so you might as well not even try to apply. Your application will fall under the non-priority projects / country and as such, will only qualify for a limited scholarship consideration, for which there are many applicants of the same kind as yours. It might be difficult for you to get a scholarship slot in that instance.