'helping, instructing Kumo Jiu Jitsu and working as a cashier'; Short written question on leadership

I've written this for a scholarship and I'm really not sure if it's good enough. Would love some feedback.

Question: Please describe in detail your most significant leadership role(s) in three activities previously stated. (Do not exceed 250 words)

Answer:

My most significant leadership roles were peer helping, instructing Kumo Jiu Jitsu and working as a cashier at Wendy's. All three require significant leadership skills, but the one that demands it the most is definitely peer helping. For less than a month now, I have been helping teach a class of second graders, and already I can see that they look up to me as a role model. One student in particular took a liking to me from day one. His name is Armaan and he once said to me that he has the "best seat in the house" because he sits near me and can talk to me easily.

One important part of leadership is being independent. When I come in every day for peer helping, the teacher is often busy with the students, so I need to circle the classroom myself to find something to do. The same goes for instructing martial arts. The main instructor cannot always dedicate enough time to each student, so it is important for me to be able to teach the students self-defence and self-discipline myself.

However, a good leader also needs to know when to ask others for help. While working as a cashier at Wendy's, I have learned that it is important to know when to rely on teammates for help. I have learned from past experiences that it is better to ask someone when you are unsure of something, than to attempt it yourself and have it blow up in your face.

Also, as a side note. How strict do you think the 250 word limit is? Mine ended up being 252 words, which I doubt is a big deal. It's also going to be printed, so I doubt they are going to count each word.

You could revise the first part by saying something like "Through my leadership roles in instrusting Kumo Jiu Jitsu and working as a cashier at Wendy's, my most challenging leadership role would be through my peer helping." then go on to describe to job. I also may leave out the kid's name and focus on how the kids like you and how it is rewarding for you.

Also, because it's printed i doubt 2 extra words would matter too much but if you condense your info a little more you probably won't have to go over the

Hi Alexander, I agree with Rebecca in context to role of leadership. What you wrote is general about leadership but I can't deduce anything particular about leadership skill you showed. Name of the student and role model thing is fascination of a child for a teacher but there is no leadership role. Also, relying on teammates for help and walking with team mates are two different things. Relying showed your weakness but taking the teammates with you altogether shows a leader. Understand the difference. Leader is the one who takes a team with him/her, in case of difficulty he take the decision and guide the whole team. It is the sense of responsibility. Can you explain your role in instructing class? How you take the place of teacher and guided the martial arts class? In my opinion, martial arts class can be a good presentation of your leadership skills.

Word limit needs to be strictly followed, you can write below 250 but not above that.

@RVINES @Ssakshijain Thanks for your advice!