Tebo, if you want to deliver the correct impression about your desire to join this program, you need to expand on the content of your essay. You have given an overview of the skills and abilities that you hope to gain through your participation in the program. That is good. It was direct to the point. However, the essay lacks a convincing aspect in terms of your ability to actually participate effectively in this program. As such, I am advising you to lengthen the essay by including some necessary points.
First of all, you must make mention of how you developed the basis of your skills and abilities. What previous experience do you have in the past that would serve as the foundation of your skills and abilities? How do you feel the program can help you gain more training or experience in this aspect? By adding to your discussion, you will be able to better portray your skills and abilities that you hope to gain as a program participant. Don't forget to mention if you lack a certain skill or ability at present. You can explain how you hope the program can help you improve upon that shortcoming of yours.
Hi Tebo, first of all WELCOME to the Essay Forum Team, I hope you find this website helpful and rather valuable to your writing projects, we aim to provide you with the most accurate and credible feedback in order to enhance your essay and to show you the difference it makes once it is reviewed.
Having said that, please find a few suggestions below;
- I strongly believe that I have the aptitude to take on this role- this role as what?, as this is the beginning of your essay, you have to make sure that you mention the subject, it has not been established yet, so you have to write it down.
- and willingness I have to learn more about leadership skills . - Enrolling with the LDF Program will illuminate
me and arm me
- with the tools needed to make
- Going back to
whatwhere I started with,
- my goal
in life is to be a source of help and
- My way of achieving
- in such a prestigious program
My aim is toI will use the skills of
but lack this tool toand reach out to the rest of the world.
am hereby reach ing out to the committee responsible
adventureoutstanding opportunity .
instead,rather my country, community
at least the people whom I'm working with. I am sure of that.my fellowmen
There you have it Tebo, I hope the above remarks are helpful to your revision, should you need further assistance, do let us know, we are here for you.