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LEADERSHIP - My chevening essay on showcasing my leadership and influencing skills



cornel 2 / 2  
Aug 14, 2019   #1

I HAVEN'T EVER BEEN IN A SUPERMARKET.


That was in my JSS 3 computer class in 2016 when I was serving my country in the mandatory national youth service corps as a secondary school computer teacher. I was trying to explain to my class that computers are useful even in a supermarket when a female student said out loud that she hoped to go to a supermarket someday. I took out my mobile phone and showed her what a supermarket looked like on YouTube. That was when it hit me, computer education is necessary for the mind of a child.

I grew up in a rural area which was outside the power grid, but my mom insisted that I got a computer literacy education. This exposed my mind to the world outside my village. And studying computer science at the university endowed me with enormous problem-solving skills. So, I decided to give the over 200 kids enrolled in the place of assignment the privilege that I enjoyed by teaching them how to use a computer. First, we needed a functional computer lab, then a power source and lastly extra time to use the computers. Firstly, got some key teachers interested in the idea of a computer lab so that they can back me up when I make a formal request to the proprietor. The proprietor was interested in the idea and allowed me to use a room which was sort of an archive for old materials and books. I got the bigger kids together and we cleaned out the room, then over the weekend, we fixed old broken furniture turned them into tables and benches. Then I spent time with the senior students using parts from one of the old desktops to fix the other two - this way I was trying to show them the internal components of the computer. Seeing the progress, the proprietor bought a generator, especially for the lab. I began to use the lab to teach students using my PC as one of the computers for practical. Whenever there was a large class, I borrowed laptops from my fellow corps members to augment. When my service year was almost over, I started to solicit donations for the laboratory. I got two extra laptops for the lab.

During the last of my two-term stay at the school, the senior students started to help me teach the younger students. They went from holding a mouse upside down to typing up the draft of the school magazine and teaching their juniors how to use the computer. After I passed out, I was pleased to hear from four of my former students that they wanted to pursue a course in computer science. I have since tried to replicate this model in more rural schools.

Leadership is about making others become better versions of themselves and as with my former student, I always take every opportunity to make team members grow. Chevening scholarship will grant me a new dimension of exposure to learn from a global community and support my work I bringing computer education to students in rural areas with perhaps more impactful methods.

Maria - / 1096  
Aug 15, 2019   #2
@cornel
Hi there, dear! Welcome. I hope you find all of this feedback helpful for your writing endeavors. If you do, please do not hesitate to hit us up once more so that we can assist you in writing.

Firstly, I heavily recommend revising areas that still need to be trimmed down. For instance, taking a look at your first paragraph, you need a little bit of structure and precision. You repeatedly mentioned yourself as an actor, making it quite excessive all throughout. I recommend that you try to minimize overexplaining situations and stick only to what is essential.

Using the word "so" (see your second paragraph, for example) as a connecting or transition word is also quite bothersome. Try to minimize this or avoid it altogether. Sticking with basics would help you simplify your language to create effective speech patterns.
contentwriter 2 / 7  
Aug 17, 2019   #3
@cornel Miss Maria has already highlighted your areas of improvement, I would like to say that your example seems to have a great impact and i guess this is what chevening looks for, you should improve your essay as suggested by Ms. Maria with the same example. Good Luck


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