Hello! I hope everybody is doing great. I have to supply four essay responses in order to submit an application for a scholarship. I would appreciate any comments on my work thus far, any corrections in grammar or syntax, or any overall suggestions. Thank you very much!!!!!!! I really appreciate it!
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Topic 1: List and describe three unique factors that have most shaped who you are (any obstacles you have faced or passions you have developed are especially relevant). 100 word limit per factor. *
1. My Mother's Guidance
In elaborating the factors that have shaped who I am today, my mother is of all, the most important influence that has transpired in my life. From early childhood, she made it her never ending endeavor to teach me what she believed would make me the best person possible. She taught me manners, so that I could become appreciative towards others; she taught me right from wrong, so that I could be prudent and modest in my decisions; and she taught me to care for others, so that others could look upon me for aid. Her guidance has been immeasurable.
2. Economic Struggles
With no support from my father for more than ten years, my mom and brother have had to fend for themselves the resources necessary for our livelihood in the United States. Due to the current recession, this responsibility has solely fallen on my brother-who by himself, has to support us and also pay his tuition for college. Through their struggles, I have learned to be modest and appreciative for what can be supplied to me, and to be selfless towards others; for I understand, that others in the world have much less than fortune has allowed us to obtain.
3. Hard work in School
From the early days of childhood, I was always motivated by my family to do my best in school. I would always remark them saying, "With a good education, anything is possible". Indeed, their conviction rose to become my own. With my arrival to "the land of opportunity", I matured into a state of full scholastic maturity. Through my arduous work in school, I not only achieved great successes, but I also learned how to be responsible for myself; how to cope with tremendous stress; how to be better motivated; and to always give my best towards achieving my dreams.
Topic 2: If you could change one thing about your community, what would you change and why? (100 word limit) *
If given the opportunity to make a positive change in my community, then I would improve the sense of unity and care amongst the individuals comprising it. In contrast to my previous residence in Peru, where I lived nearly four years of my life, it is unfortunate to note that here neighbors do not know their neighbors; that people do not gather as a community to look upon the well being of one to the other; and that people choose to be rather solitary. It is important to change this, as a close community is stronger than a fragmented one.
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Topic 1: List and describe three unique factors that have most shaped who you are (any obstacles you have faced or passions you have developed are especially relevant). 100 word limit per factor. *
1. My Mother's Guidance
In elaborating the factors that have shaped who I am today, my mother is of all, the most important influence that has transpired in my life. From early childhood, she made it her never ending endeavor to teach me what she believed would make me the best person possible. She taught me manners, so that I could become appreciative towards others; she taught me right from wrong, so that I could be prudent and modest in my decisions; and she taught me to care for others, so that others could look upon me for aid. Her guidance has been immeasurable.
2. Economic Struggles
With no support from my father for more than ten years, my mom and brother have had to fend for themselves the resources necessary for our livelihood in the United States. Due to the current recession, this responsibility has solely fallen on my brother-who by himself, has to support us and also pay his tuition for college. Through their struggles, I have learned to be modest and appreciative for what can be supplied to me, and to be selfless towards others; for I understand, that others in the world have much less than fortune has allowed us to obtain.
3. Hard work in School
From the early days of childhood, I was always motivated by my family to do my best in school. I would always remark them saying, "With a good education, anything is possible". Indeed, their conviction rose to become my own. With my arrival to "the land of opportunity", I matured into a state of full scholastic maturity. Through my arduous work in school, I not only achieved great successes, but I also learned how to be responsible for myself; how to cope with tremendous stress; how to be better motivated; and to always give my best towards achieving my dreams.
Topic 2: If you could change one thing about your community, what would you change and why? (100 word limit) *
If given the opportunity to make a positive change in my community, then I would improve the sense of unity and care amongst the individuals comprising it. In contrast to my previous residence in Peru, where I lived nearly four years of my life, it is unfortunate to note that here neighbors do not know their neighbors; that people do not gather as a community to look upon the well being of one to the other; and that people choose to be rather solitary. It is important to change this, as a close community is stronger than a fragmented one.
