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Motivation Letter for Scholarship (MS Business Intelligence)


Saqibawan112 1 / 1  
Feb 8, 2014   #1
Hello Everyone, I wonder if I can get some feed back on following essay questions on grammatical issue and structure. Right now, I am not very much concerned about character limit, but I will be appreciative if someone could comment on that as well. Thank You for your time and consideration. I have removed the sensitive information from the below answers for security.

1- Describe your master's program/s in XYZ-Country and elaborate on how you think it will affect your professional and personal development? (800 char)
Answer:
I am planning to do Master's in business intelligence from ABC-university.
During my bachelors, I developed an interest in econometric models and using statistics to help a business; it was this interest that has kept me in the Data Analysis field for almost 2 years now.

This program will allow me to take advantage of the modern techniques and methods of data analysis, statistical inference and implementation of business intelligence tools in organization. I am currently working as Data Analyst in the biggest BPO Company in home-country and this Master's program will surely equip me with all the necessary tools that I need to accelerate my career. It will also open a way to resume research and further studies within this stream.

2- Give one concrete example of a current challenge or possibility that is important for you and your home country. Relate it to your master's program? (600 chars)

Answer:
"Are you ready for the era of Big Data?"
Most of us have heard this watchword. Developed countries are realizing the importance of insight that can be extracted from digital media; Obama's proposal of 'Big Data Research and Development Initiative' is just an example of this.

With advancements in IT field, companies are creating large databases, but competencies within the analysis and management advisory fields are missing. At this peak time, I believe, my country is in great need of individuals who are capable of utilizing this Big Data to help stabilize the economy and security of the country with effective decision making skills.

Currently, there are very few universities in the world; and not even a single one in 'home-country'; which are offering programs in business analytic. I believe, with my interest and skills in this field, I can make an effort to enlist my country among those who forge the grounds for research in this emerging field and seize the best out of it.

3- Describe your platform (e.g. experience, engagements, skills, ambitions, goal, networks) from which you have the ambition to contribute to the development of your home country? (600 chars)

Answer:
After doing my master's in BI, I am planning to come back and resume my professional career as Data Scientist, with much more expertise in modern tools and practices. My familiarity with local conditions and my penchant for exploring the limits of quantitative modeling will both enable me to help build more personalized BI solutions for the companies and hence foster growth.

I would also like to work in the academic realm to stimulate scientific research in universities which will definitely serve my country in terms of capacity building. I am sure this Master's program is going to be another link in the chain of achievement I have been building on a daily basis.

4- Give one concrete example of how you expect that your scholarship period in XYZ-Country will contribute to addressing the challenges or possibilities in your home country? (600 chars)

Answer:
My study program in XYZ-Country is specifically tailored to teach the art of harnessing the vast unstructured volumes of information generated by IT systems in order to drive decisions and improve day-to-day operations. The program will give me an opportunity to work with real data and solve the practical problems of the companies.

XYZ-Country has a long history of storing data; Database-X is just a byte of it. The existence of such infrastructure and easy data accessibility will agile my interaction with real world problems. With this global vision of development, I can certainly respond to the current organizational need for business intelligence in my home country.
Lauramurg 1 / 2  
Feb 9, 2014   #2
very good quality of writing. Try get it to flow smoothly a little more as well as making sure your sentence structure is good.
OP Saqibawan112 1 / 1  
Feb 9, 2014   #3
Thanks a lot for your time Lauramurg.
I would really appreciate if you can sort of pin-point some areas where you think I lost the flow? Your critique will help me a lot :)


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