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What to do next, when I lose the scholarship? I would not let this weight me down.


farouq334 1 / 2 1  
Nov 23, 2016   #1
prompt:If you do not receive the MasterCard Foundation Scholarship, what are your plans for the next four years?

My family has always tried so much to make ends meet after my father retired from the military, this made education and feeding in our home very poor. Even though we going through a difficult time, my siblings and I still try so much to do our best academically. So if am not given this scholarship, I will still work hard to attain my goals. A wise man once said "we must accept finite disappointment but never lose infinite hope.

Am currently working as a staff in a computer training firm so as to help with part of the bills in the house. I strongly believe that with or without this scholarship, I will keep on working hard and by God's grace and blessing, I will achieve my goal. While working, I learn new things every day from the people I teach and this also keeps me going .Like Martin Luther king, jr. once said "the ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands in times of challenge and controversy." .

So if am not give this scholarship, I would not let this weigh me down .for the next for years i would work hard and continue to do what I know best cause no man knows what life has in store for him.

Holt [Contributor] - / 9,355 2884  
Nov 23, 2016   #2
Farouq, the first paragraph is really not important to the response for this statement. You have a pretty strong introduction to your response in the current second paragraph. You should delete the first paragraph and use the second one instead to represent your plans should you lose the scholarship. However, I would like to caution you about seemingly telling the reviewer that you will be giving up on your dream in some sort of way. These sorts of prompts often allow you to present an avenue for discussion with the reviewer by having you offer up unique or standard ideas regarding how you will pursue a college degree. They want to see a "never say die" attitude in this case. You should prove that you will do whatever it takes to complete your education, even if it takes me a number of years longer because you failed to get the scholarship. The reviewer wants to know if you have a "get up and go" attitude that will help you succeed in the world even if you have to go it alone for some reason. Strengthen your essay by showing your inner strength instead of sounding so defeatist in your statement. Let the reviewer know that you will not give up on your dreams just like that.
OP farouq334 1 / 2 1  
Nov 23, 2016   #3
thanks i have made some adjustments:I am currently awaiting my admission into the university and my goal within the next four years is to complete my degree programme and have at least two professional certificate.

My family has always tried so much to make ends meet after my father retired from the military, this made education and feeding in our home very poor. Even though we going through a difficult time, my siblings and I still try so much to do our best academically.

So if am not given this scholarship, I will still work hard to attain my goals.

Am currently working as a staff in a computer training firm so as to help with part of the bills in the house. I strongly believe that with or without this scholarship, I will keep on working hard to achieve my goal.

While working, I learn new things every day from the people I teach and this also keeps me going .Like Martin Luther king, jr. once said the ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands in times of challenge and controversy. .

So if am not given this scholarship, I would not let this weigh me down for the next four years, i would work hard
Holt [Contributor] - / 9,355 2884  
Nov 24, 2016   #4
Farouq, your opening sentiment is out of place in the essay. Since this is a word limited statement, you should open the response directly with the explanation of what you will do if you don't get the scholarship. A single paragraph statement should actually suffice for your answer. My suggestion would be to develop your plan of action in the following manner:

Coming from a family that values education even though we have never been financially stable enough to do so, I would have to say that, in the event I do not get this scholarship, nothing will change for me. Over the next four years, I will still strive to gain the best education that I can because that is what I want to achieve in my life. I will work even harder in order to attain my academic ambitions. So, I will continue to work as a staff member of a computer training firm while saving up for school and helping to defray costs at my family's home. I will also continue to look into other scholarship programs that may be interested in helping me to fulfill my dreams of attending higher education learning centers. In the words of Martin Luther King, "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands in times of challenge and controversy". I will not give up on my dreams nor will I be weighed down by it. Instead, I will use the next four years to continue working towards the realization of my life ambitions and plans.

Do you see the difference in the two versions of the statement? You have your version which is somewhat scattered in presentation and lacking in cohesiveness. The version I developed for you is more in tune with the expected response to the prompt. You can either use that version as a sample for your own new statement version or just use what I wrote for you. That should help you better respond to the prompt.
OP farouq334 1 / 2 1  
Nov 24, 2016   #5
thank you so much i really appriciate


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