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The possibilities for the brain - Questbridge Topical Essay - curiosity



thaonhi97 2 / 5  
Sep 22, 2020   #1
Tell us about a concept, theory, or topic you have explored simply because it sparked your intellectual curiosity.

Why do you find it intriguing? How do you want to explore it further?



As I lay there with twenty metal electrodes on my scalp, my mind pondered on how powerful the brain is. It controls so many functions of our body, emotions, movement, dreams, thoughts essentially everything. My mind is blown away on how a three pound mass of muscle has the capacity to control so much of our lives.

My curiosity for this organ began when I found myself getting frequent migraines. I thought they were just bad headaches until my days consisted of laying in a dark room for hours. When I seeked medical help for my migraines, the doctors were stumped on why I had migraines at the age of thirteen. They ran tests, prescribed medicine and nothing helped. I thought it was strange for doctors to attend more than twelve years of schooling and not know much about the brain. I realized that there is only a finite amount of knowledge we know about the brain ─ this is why I find it intriguing.

Proceeding my migraines, my curiosity for the brain only grew when I started to experience sleep paralysis. Normally, I can lucid dream, meaning that I am aware of my dreams and have some sort of control over them. This one particular night, I woke up panting and sweating and I could not move my body. I saw a black shadow figure in the corner of my room and it felt so real that I could not comprehend what really happened that night. Finally I snapped from this strange form yet realistic "dream." Ever since this experience, I find myself wondering more about the concept of dreams; how are we able to learn more about them? The only thing that holds the answers to my question is the brain. Although the thought and experience of sleep paralysis is traumatizing, it furthered my curiosity for the brain.

It amazes me how people have been around for centuries yet there is still a limited amount of knowledge we know on the brain. Even with the development of new technology and research, we only know so much. I have so many questions about the brain and how the entire organ's mechanism works. How is it able to control our dreams? How is it able to induce pain? How is there a little voice in my head reading and thinking?

The possibilities for the brain are infinite. The only way I can find my answers is to pursue a career in neurology, the study of the brain and its functions. In order to further explore my curiosity, I must be well educated on the known knowledge of the brain. I plan on majoring in Neurobiology to gain a full understanding of the brain. I want to be on the front line of the developing research of the brain. The study of the brain is an continuously evolving topic that has sparked my curiosity which later matured into a passion that I want to deeply explore in my life.

I appreciate any feedback! I had another idea of comparing the brain to the ocean about how we only know so little of the vast body of ocean but that was just another direction that I could have taken this prompt but I'm not sure if this is strong enough.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15370  
Sep 23, 2020   #2
You should realign the paragraphs. You can make it more interesting if you reorganize the paragraphs to have a more relevant hook, go into the contemplation, then the discussion. So, I was thinking something along the lines of (paragraph arrangement) 2,3,1, 4, 5. Do not go with any other form for your discussion. This personalized relevance is what the reviewer will be most interested in. Comparing the brain to the ocean would be overkill for this discussion. Always keep it close to home. Prove relevance on a personal foundation to create impressive relevance in the discussion. The essay has relevant content. I would not add or remove anything from your presentation. Like I said, it only needs a better presentation format. Rearranging the paragraphs can help you accomplish that.
OP thaonhi97 2 / 5  
Sep 23, 2020   #3
@Holt
Okay thank you so much again!!


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