I have practiced different levels of leadership during the last 8 years and in different channels.

Please help me reviewing this, Holt. ASAP

Leadership and Influence - Chevening Scholarship Question

I have practiced different levels of leadership during the last 8 years and in different channels. It all started in my home town when I was 18, I joined a voluntary team securing amounts of food supplies for elderly people who have no jobs. The team collapsed for many reasons but my feeling of responsibility was catalyzed. I kept securing more food supplies, made a list of people in need and made a simple data base. I started to gather team members back and it was my first time to deal with conflicts and different ideas. I tried to gather them all around one purpose and actually it worked. I had the chance to lead them again and make roles and tasks clear for everyone. That helped us last till the present. This was when I developed a real sense of responsibility towards society and practiced my first influencing action.

I have been working for more than 9 part-time Jobs during my undergraduate period. That gave me a high sense of commitment. I noticed that many students has no chance to attend in college daily or even weekly for reasons related to their social conditions. First, I did a survey on the most critical areas in Ash Sharqia. I started to gather a team of 4 students and we talked with students who live in those areas and able to supply them by study materials. Finally we formed a team who delivers study materials for these students. We helped over 80 students and I secured part-time jobs for 12 of them. My biggest motivation then was to let no one down because these problems lead to non-affiliation that also leads to bigger problems of crime, social violence and maybe terrorism.

Fourteen months ago, in the company I work for now as an Operations Manager, our figures weren't satisfactory. We were losing good calibers and literally there was no income for two months. I began to gather data from all sections and I have studied every single detail for two weeks. I put a plan to change these statistics into positive ones. First, I started to hire 3 new employees in different positions and trained them myself. I gathered a team consisting of the heads of each sectors and we started together to implement some changes. I put growth rate target and divided that target into small targets to make them feel that our targets are achievable. Week after week, I kept motivating and selling them the future. After one month of hard work, figures started to transform positively. We improved our growth rate and all employees contributed to this tremendous improvement. This is my best mature engaging professional experience with leadership. It granted me transformational leadership mindset I will carry forward towards any endeavor.

@BusinessGeek
I think your essay is weak related with the topic. Maybe you have to consider to check your structure highlighting the context,action and final result of you experience in leadership and influencial skills for every example that you give.

Ahmed, are you sure that your 9 part time work experiences, when combined with your 14 month permanent work experience will total 2 years worth of job exposure? Simply saying 8 years varied work experience does not mean you have the total work hours required completed. You must compute those work hours in order to make sure you pass the required minimum work hours. Remember, Chevening will accept part time job references, along with relevant volunteer work, only if it adds up to a total of 2 years or 2,800 hours total of work time. Therefore, you need to make a reference to the length of time that you performed in each work capacity for the computation of your 2 years work experience to be valid. So work schedules and years you participated in these activities need to be indicated in the essay.

Now, it is not only the work time that you need to be qualified for in this essay. It also needs to have clear depictions of your leadership and influencing roles in every instance. The references to these elements are questionable in this essay as the representations are not clear. You also need to discuss each of the 9 part time jobs that you have had that exemplify the leadership and influencing skills or, at least mention the most significant one that you can think of to justify those roles during those work periods. Clarify what the job was, what your position was, then the situation that required your leadership and influencing skills to come into play. I think there is a potential to prove these points in your essay. Unfortunately, the presentation of the requirements remained unclear to the end of your essay.