The essay is on point until you get to the last paragraph. Since it appears that you are going to have some sort of career change from Mechanical Engineering to Renewable Energy, there needs to be a bridge in the discussion of this interest. What I am looking for in this essay, which the reviewer will also be looking for, is an explanation of how your Mechanical Engineering degree will be relevant to your Renewable Energy masters course. You mention that briefly in the portion about:
I will exercise my acquired expertise as a Mechanical Engineer in the Alternative Energy Development Board
So there is a halfway point that will connect the two courses, which you should be showing in the essay. It would help if, as a Mechanical Engineer, you have already done some work in the field of renewable energy as this will show that you have the foundation for studies in the Renewable Energy field. This will also help you better respond to the part of the prompt that requires you to show ways that your personal background has encouraged you to want to make an impact in your home country.
Right now, the discussion highlights more of your education rather than a balanced presentation of the prompt requirements. Shorten your personal background. Focus more on how your exposure to your father's work helped build the foundation for your interest in mechanical engineering and renewable energy. Truth be told, your barrier to higher education is not as compelling as it sounds. Your problem only relates to a mixed family setting. Which means there were several households in one house. That is not exactly the kind of dramatic and compelling situation that the scholarship would consider to be note worthy.
The fact that your father lost his job when you were in 3rd grade? Not relevant. The prompt is asking you to discuss higher education. So that means college level. Third grade is elementary, high school is secondary education, and college, is tertiary or higher education as that is the focused and specialized field of education that is relevant to your scholarship application.