choose the community service activity that is most meaningful to you and describe how you and your community benefited from your involvement:
Rolled up in the corner of the sofa, I watched innocent lives vanish off the face of the Earth in the waves of Hurricane Katrina on August 26, 2005. Four years later, I finally took a dive to directly help families in New Orleans with an all-expense paid scholarship to build houses for underprivileged families. In Louisiana, I, with nine other students, were given a mission to build three houses with nothing but screws, nails, wood, cement, paint, and the like. We completed everything from grading and site preparation to truss construction and painting. We spent our break time at Habitat ReStore that sells new or used items from clothes and furniture to kitchen tiles and dishes, sorting incoming items and working as cashiers. My sweat paid off when I helped the three thankful families move into their new houses. Building houses had initially sounded impossible; I had never built anything before and had never even hammered a nail on a block of wood. Yet, my passion to end poverty housing in New Orleans allowed my amateur hands to build three houses. It was exhilarating to witness and to soak in this idea that passion can take me anywhere whether it is persuading my parents for permission to travel to New Orleans or building three houses out of scratch. Upon my return to home, I spoke at Habitat for Humanity meetings and service organizations, sharing my experience and the importance of ending poverty housing and responding to natural disasters.
pretty short and straight to the point. any grammatical errors or anything i should extend on?
Rolled up in the corner of the sofa, I watched innocent lives vanish off the face of the Earth in the waves of Hurricane Katrina on August 26, 2005. Four years later, I finally took a dive to directly help families in New Orleans with an all-expense paid scholarship to build houses for underprivileged families. In Louisiana, I, with nine other students, were given a mission to build three houses with nothing but screws, nails, wood, cement, paint, and the like. We completed everything from grading and site preparation to truss construction and painting. We spent our break time at Habitat ReStore that sells new or used items from clothes and furniture to kitchen tiles and dishes, sorting incoming items and working as cashiers. My sweat paid off when I helped the three thankful families move into their new houses. Building houses had initially sounded impossible; I had never built anything before and had never even hammered a nail on a block of wood. Yet, my passion to end poverty housing in New Orleans allowed my amateur hands to build three houses. It was exhilarating to witness and to soak in this idea that passion can take me anywhere whether it is persuading my parents for permission to travel to New Orleans or building three houses out of scratch. Upon my return to home, I spoke at Habitat for Humanity meetings and service organizations, sharing my experience and the importance of ending poverty housing and responding to natural disasters.
pretty short and straight to the point. any grammatical errors or anything i should extend on?