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Statement Of Purpose (my study and self introduction) for POSCO scholarship

Nishi1977 1 / 1  
Mar 16, 2022   #1
Hello, I am writing essay very first time ..i am confused about what should i include & not ...i prepared this.. so please suggest me and help me through this

Statement Of Purpose

Glad to introduce myself as Miss Nishi Patel, a recent graduate at this. My career is my passion, and it holds my fullest devotion, dedication and commitment. I belong to the world of technology, which had been the dream I had, the obsession in me and so the future desire that had lingered in me for a protracted while. And eventually, once I got into this, I could give nothing from me but the foremost effective. To feature more value to the identical, I've got decided with the foremost effective thought of doing my Master's Degree from a reputed institution which could give me not only a degree but also a replacement variety of learning with international standards, innovative methods of self-development, skills and also the power of survival among the fittest. Which I feel should shape me and make myself qualified acceptable the pc science skills and to the progress within the fashionable globalized cultures, technology and era.

I hold my Under-Graduate degree, bachelors in engineering which I had completed in July 2021 from the Veer Narmada south Gujarat University, Gujarat. I pursued my UG Degree within the S.S. Agrawal College, Navsari . The syllabus covered here gave me immense knowledge on Computer Applications. Computing has definitely made me more aware of how education works as I'm constantly having to carry out my very own personal research in my spare time to help aid me. My problem-solving skills are influenced the foremost by that time thanks to the coding which I find very challenging in some stages, but very rewarding when it's solved. I've got really been enlightened on the world of IT and therefore the way it plays such a functional, extensive and essentially a component of the many elements of life. I wish to test full because it'll allow me to use the skills I've got learned in my current studies into reality scenarios; giving me the facility to hopefully create systems that individuals will use in their everyday lives.

While attending college for a bachelor's Degree, I worked part-time as Private Teacher with the subject of English, Math , science and from this experience, gained many valuable insight and knowledge into a Responsible person. This could be where I understand and realize that every person has their own capabilities and different way of learning and thinking. So it helped me lots to think in multi-dimension. I always attempt to share my best knowledge to my students.

My family encompass 4 members-My father, Mother, Younger sister and me. After accustomed be} 17 y/o I used to be a caregiver of my younger sister because my father has been hospitalized for his open heart bypass surgery. I've need to remain alone with my younger sister that have taught me plenty about finance management and responsibilities at very young age. I belong to an awfully class family where my father was only a personal who work and fulfil our needs. Therein tough time my mother started a shop, so she's going to fulfil our basic needs. At that time I started helping in her work. She never quit and worked hard .she taught me to be brave and powerful in every situation in life. My parents are my biggest inspiration. Because of them I became very strong, dedicated and adaptive person. All of them are vital an element of my life and have encouraged me much to fulfil all my dreams. I always wanted to test overseas since it'll help me in personal development and might give me the foremost effective experience of my life but as a girl from socio-economic class family it's really difficult to induce the chance due to our condition.

Awarding this scholarship will make great contribution to my study. This scholarship would allow me to work less and focus more on my studies. Meanwhile, this scholarship will support me to do and do more on community service and explore my potential in assisting the necessities of people. Furthermore, receiving this scholarship will give me more opportunities to attend the conference and expose to newly developed technology. Additionally, awarding this scholarship would further motivate me to pursue academic excellence.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 13,223 4319  
Mar 16, 2022   #2
Aside from the fact that the essay does not deliver a clear statement of purpose in relation to the chosen masters course, the overall essay cannot be understood by a native English speaker / reader. That means, the essay does not make any sense to the reader because the text comes across as very badly written. The grammar is problematic and seems to have passed through a software translator.

While there is no specific prompt provided for the statement of purpose it still needs to highlight several sets of information:
1. The family background in relation to character development
2. Community service that proves a leadership ability and the possibility that the applicant will be a future leader in his home country
3. The educational background as it relates to the profession of the applicant
4. The professional experience of the applicant in relation to his need to apply for masters studies. Discuss your professional character as well.
5. The reasons why the applicant believes that he will benefit from a masters course gained in Korea.

Respond to these guide questions using proper English grammar and you should come up with a more relevant statement of purpose and self introduction. If you have a problem with writing in English, then you can contact me privately so that I can assist you with the development of your essay. You seriously need professional help in developing your response based upon what I have read here.
OP Nishi1977 1 / 1  
Mar 16, 2022   #3
thank you for your feedback . i will try my best to fix it

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