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UC Admissions Essay - My experience and how it adds value to UC (250 Words)


theAbraham 3 / 16  
Nov 7, 2009   #1
This is an essay I wrote for the University of Cincinnati application. It's supposed to be approximately 250 words and describe my academic achievements, life experience, personal interests, and what value I would add to the University.

Can I get your opinions on how well I answered the prompt and with any errors? Thanks in advance for any help.


During freshman year of high-school I moved in with my older brothers, who were both finishing their undergraduate studies at the University of Florida. Being close knit brothers, I could talk to many of their friends, students with varying majors, and ask about their interests, their research and for their best advice. Through those experiences I learned these students were passionate about something, and with deliberate actions they were able to make significant changes.

I quickly realized the importance of finding my own passion, something I could frame my outlook around and do for the rest of my life. After stumbling through an array of hobbies I got sucked into the world of design. I became addicted to font faces, matching colors and anything aesthetically pleasing. Design for me, though, doesn't just end their: I feel designers today have a huge opportunity to help craft the future. People usually think of innovation as happening in a research laboratory; however, I think designers have an ability to look at the world differently, and truly inspire change. Designers also become exponentially more potent when complimented with someone of a different skill set, like an engineer.

That's why I want to go to the University of Cincinnati that has a program like DAAP, so I can find opportunities to do interdisciplinary work with students of differing interests; something a traditional art school cannot offer. I know though a lot will be expected from me, but I'm confident in my ability to excel; especially after taking a full college course load for two years as a dual enrolled student and balancing my co-curricular work.
lycjack 3 / 11  
Nov 8, 2009   #2
Very nice work. "doesn't just end their" should be "doesn't just end there".
However, I think you can add something about what you do on aesthetics. That would be more compatible with the prompt"personal interests". Personal Opinion.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Nov 8, 2009   #3
Being among my brothers, I could talk to many of their friends -- students with varying majors -- and ask about their interests, their research and for their best advice. Through discourse, I learned that these students were passionate about something, and with deliberate actions they were able to make significant changes.

That's why I want to participate in DAAP at the University of Cincinnati that has a program like DAAP, so that I can find opportunities to...


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