AIF - Honours Arts at the University of Waterloo

HEY So the deadline is 3.17 which is TOMORROW so I really need anybody who is willing to look over my paragraph T^T

Question 1

Reasons for choosing your program and Waterloo

(*Required)

Please tell us about your educational goals, your interest...

Answer 1
Honours Arts at the University of Waterloo is known to be a cooperative and flexible first-year program. As someone who enjoys exploring a wide variety of interests, I strongly believe that the boundless opportunities available at Waterloo will greatly benefit me in pursuing a degree in Bachelor of Arts. Through the Honours Arts program, not only will I be able to major in my passion for the fine arts, but I will also be able to further develop skills needed to grow and learn to become the best of the best at what I do. In today's society the majority with art degrees are commonly known as "starving artists" or they'll find themselves to be jobless. However, with the help of Waterloo's superior co op program I strongly believe that I can become the minority that rises to success. I believe my life's dream of becoming an art teacher can only be accomplished through Waterloo.

Julie, try to avoid general comments in your response which show that you just read the website and decided to try and apply at the university. Statements such as "...is known to be a cooperative and flexible first-year program." tells the reviewer that you do not have a deeper understanding of the requirements and benefits of the program that you chose. It would be best for you to remove that line and just open the statement with "As someone who..." Do not mention "starving artists", those unsuccessful in your field should not figure into the essay because it sounds demeaning to those who are "struggling artists" of which you will be or a period of time after graduation. Just say "With the help of Waterloo's co-op program..." That will deliver a more insightful tone that reflects you educational goal, interest in the program, and reasons for your university choice.