I REALLY need help with the editing of this essay, all comments are accepted.. This is my rough draft and I have no idea where to take it from here:
Art has always been a part of my life. Ever since I was young my passion has been to create. I would buy arts and crafts books and challenge myself to finish each project no matter how difficult it was. I ditched my dolls, and stuffed animals to help my brother with his architecture projects. As I got older, I stopped listening to my creative self and began to focus more on other people's idea of success. After graduating high school at 16, I was still very confused and trying to find myself. I started attending college without an idea of who I was, or whom I wanted to become. All I cared about is what everyone told me; which was to major in a career with a high job demand. Becoming a nurse or a teacher were my top options. When making a decision of which of the two to choose I opted for the one in which I could be the most creative.
After a few months of thinking about my future, I decided to major in Early Childhood Education. Within a few semesters of study, I got the chance to visit a classroom at a new school in town to experience being a teacher. My first thoughts in the classroom were 'how bright and colorful is this room?!'. I seemed to have enjoyed the decor at the school more than I enjoyed the teaching experience. I wish I would have known then, what I know now.
After my volunteer service as a teacher, I decided to take a break from school. During this break I found out a lot about myself, and finally figured it all out. I realized that I wanted to become an interior designer. I researched for months about interior design, and what school would be the right fit for me. I found ______________(school name), visited one of its open houses and looked nowhere else since.
I would love to have the pleasure to attend_____________ because, I believe this school and its curriculum will prepare me for the career of my dreams. Having working design professionals as teachers was an important factor when choosing the right school. and based on my research I know the staff at __________ will not only help me expand my knowledge but open up a new world of opportunities in my chosen field. The thought of having Manhattan as my campus, makes this dream that much more exciting. The opportunities in this city are limitless.
As a transfer student, I've had the chance to experience regular college and I can say that it was not for me. At _____ I know every class I take will be of lifetime importance. Applying to this school was a major step on becoming what I was destined to be, and given the amazing opportunity to attend I know I will excel as an interior designer.
Art has always been a part of my life. Ever since I was young my passion has been to create. I would buy arts and crafts books and challenge myself to finish each project no matter how difficult it was. I ditched my dolls, and stuffed animals to help my brother with his architecture projects. As I got older, I stopped listening to my creative self and began to focus more on other people's idea of success. After graduating high school at 16, I was still very confused and trying to find myself. I started attending college without an idea of who I was, or whom I wanted to become. All I cared about is what everyone told me; which was to major in a career with a high job demand. Becoming a nurse or a teacher were my top options. When making a decision of which of the two to choose I opted for the one in which I could be the most creative.
After a few months of thinking about my future, I decided to major in Early Childhood Education. Within a few semesters of study, I got the chance to visit a classroom at a new school in town to experience being a teacher. My first thoughts in the classroom were 'how bright and colorful is this room?!'. I seemed to have enjoyed the decor at the school more than I enjoyed the teaching experience. I wish I would have known then, what I know now.
After my volunteer service as a teacher, I decided to take a break from school. During this break I found out a lot about myself, and finally figured it all out. I realized that I wanted to become an interior designer. I researched for months about interior design, and what school would be the right fit for me. I found ______________(school name), visited one of its open houses and looked nowhere else since.
I would love to have the pleasure to attend_____________ because, I believe this school and its curriculum will prepare me for the career of my dreams. Having working design professionals as teachers was an important factor when choosing the right school. and based on my research I know the staff at __________ will not only help me expand my knowledge but open up a new world of opportunities in my chosen field. The thought of having Manhattan as my campus, makes this dream that much more exciting. The opportunities in this city are limitless.
As a transfer student, I've had the chance to experience regular college and I can say that it was not for me. At _____ I know every class I take will be of lifetime importance. Applying to this school was a major step on becoming what I was destined to be, and given the amazing opportunity to attend I know I will excel as an interior designer.
