Hi,
I sent this Common App essay to all of the liberal arts colleges that I applied to. I have no idea why I didn't spend more time on it, as I feel that it is a terrible essay. I felt like it was good at the time. The thing isn't even 400 words. I have been kicking myself throughout January, as I know that I could've written about my unique background, and why I want to be an Ethnomusicologist. I don't know why I didn't. I'm sure this essay is why I was deferred from Mount Holyoke. I know I am a good writer, and wish I'd taken the chance to prove it. I think this could be a huge detriment to me. My supplemental essays are considerably stronger... dare I say it, stellar. Would this help them overlook this essay? Anyway, it's too late to change it now. I'm not sure why I want it to be reviewed. I don't know. FYI, reassurance is NOT all that I'm looking for. Harsh criticism is welcome. Just let me know what you feel. Thanks for reading.
"Describe a place or environment where you are perfectly content. What do you do or experience there, and why is it meaningful to you?"
I am perfectly content when I am in my room with the curtains drawn, my headphones on and the lights off. I call it my "thinking hour".
The darkness temporarily suspends my sense of sight, and the inability to hear any sound past my headphones is satisfying. As cliché as it may sound, I feel like I am in a bubble.
It's a rare moment where I can be totally alone and at one with myself and my thoughts. The combination of darkness and music enables me to feel as if I'm entering another realm. At that point, I'm able to relax and think clearly.
When I close my eyes, I feel weightless. I believe that the feeling of weightlessness is caused by the clarity that deep thinking gives me. The accumulated weight of the day that I carry upon my chest and shoulders is lifted.
This moment of relaxation and clarity is extremely meaningful to me, because it's important that we as humans don't allow the stress of everyday life to consume us.
My thinking hour gives my mind the chance to think assiduously, and allows my being to remain firmly within the bounds of sanity. In the past, my thinking hour has stopped me from making rash and illogical decisions that could have caused detriment to me, whether it be at that point or in the future.
I find it a lot easier to create after (sometimes during) the thinking hour. It is easier for me to understand what I am feeling and translate it into song with a clear mind . When my mind is nebulous, my feelings are elusive and I find it difficult to write down exactly what it is that I am trying to say. I understand that built up sadness, frustration or confusion held internally is no good, but for someone like myself who can be very introverted, it's not often that I like to share my feelings with others. This is a huge reason as to why my thinking hour is essential and meaningful to me.
My thinking hour is a type of therapy, and has most certainly helped me get through difficult times and situations. Without my thinking hour, I would have no release.
True serenity can only be achieved through purely peaceful surroundings. For me, this is it.
I sent this Common App essay to all of the liberal arts colleges that I applied to. I have no idea why I didn't spend more time on it, as I feel that it is a terrible essay. I felt like it was good at the time. The thing isn't even 400 words. I have been kicking myself throughout January, as I know that I could've written about my unique background, and why I want to be an Ethnomusicologist. I don't know why I didn't. I'm sure this essay is why I was deferred from Mount Holyoke. I know I am a good writer, and wish I'd taken the chance to prove it. I think this could be a huge detriment to me. My supplemental essays are considerably stronger... dare I say it, stellar. Would this help them overlook this essay? Anyway, it's too late to change it now. I'm not sure why I want it to be reviewed. I don't know. FYI, reassurance is NOT all that I'm looking for. Harsh criticism is welcome. Just let me know what you feel. Thanks for reading.
"Describe a place or environment where you are perfectly content. What do you do or experience there, and why is it meaningful to you?"
I am perfectly content when I am in my room with the curtains drawn, my headphones on and the lights off. I call it my "thinking hour".
The darkness temporarily suspends my sense of sight, and the inability to hear any sound past my headphones is satisfying. As cliché as it may sound, I feel like I am in a bubble.
It's a rare moment where I can be totally alone and at one with myself and my thoughts. The combination of darkness and music enables me to feel as if I'm entering another realm. At that point, I'm able to relax and think clearly.
When I close my eyes, I feel weightless. I believe that the feeling of weightlessness is caused by the clarity that deep thinking gives me. The accumulated weight of the day that I carry upon my chest and shoulders is lifted.
This moment of relaxation and clarity is extremely meaningful to me, because it's important that we as humans don't allow the stress of everyday life to consume us.
My thinking hour gives my mind the chance to think assiduously, and allows my being to remain firmly within the bounds of sanity. In the past, my thinking hour has stopped me from making rash and illogical decisions that could have caused detriment to me, whether it be at that point or in the future.
I find it a lot easier to create after (sometimes during) the thinking hour. It is easier for me to understand what I am feeling and translate it into song with a clear mind . When my mind is nebulous, my feelings are elusive and I find it difficult to write down exactly what it is that I am trying to say. I understand that built up sadness, frustration or confusion held internally is no good, but for someone like myself who can be very introverted, it's not often that I like to share my feelings with others. This is a huge reason as to why my thinking hour is essential and meaningful to me.
My thinking hour is a type of therapy, and has most certainly helped me get through difficult times and situations. Without my thinking hour, I would have no release.
True serenity can only be achieved through purely peaceful surroundings. For me, this is it.