Describe the unique qualities that attract you to the specific undergraduate College or School (including preferred admission and dual degree programs) to which you are applying at the University of Michigan. How would that curriculum support your interests? (500 words)
I have always drifted towards biology and anatomy, from tinkering in my mom's classroom in China at age 5 to modeling how organic molecules interact with each other to form proteins. This joy for learning about life transferred into my classes, which are now overwhelmingly science based, including AP and college level courses, with plans to finish Organic Chemistry II and Molecular Biology next semester. I aim to double major in Biochemistry and Bio-medical Engineering, then advance to medical school to become a physician.
The University of Michigan first captured my interest in 8th grade at a school visit as I pictured the vibrant campus, spirited sports culture, and unique traditions.
Academically, exploring my double major with undergraduate research stands as my main goal as Throughout high school, I have pursued rigorous course loads with 5 APs during my sophomore year then excelling at least 2 lab courses and making the dean's list every semester during junior and senior year make confident with the course loads necessary for a double major. The Combined Degree program between LSA and the College of Engineering would enable me to pursue my differing interests while living and learning communities like the Women in Science and Engineering Residence Program (WISE RP) appeals to me as I would be in a innovation community of determined like minded students. Undergraduate research is equally if not more important to me as I would like to familiarize myself with the process and have a chance to actually put the knowledge from courses into practical use. I would like to first participate in a research group to familiarize myself with the skills and methodology of research. I hope to also raise new research questions or pursue a project of my interest in the future. University of Michigan's Undergraduate Research Opportunity would provide an hands-on introduction to the lab and research. But, more specifically the Chemistry department's Summer Undergraduate Research Program represents an in depth exploration of both the topic and research methods. While the engineering department's Vertically Integrated Program would provide invaluable opportunities to learn from graduate students, post-docs and faculty in an interdisciplinary environment.
Personally, I also found a diverse, close-knit intellectual community in a historic and city. As a 8th grader, hearing stories of traditions like wading across the fountain, avoiding the "M" in the Diag at all costs, and painting The Rock just sounded like an incredible amount of fun. Now, I love the traditions as they represent the family and support within the campus. When looking for campuses, a strange criteria I had was that they had to have a winter. After enjoying 6 years where winter composed of half the months,as strange as it sounds getting back to winter storms and scraping car windows sounds wonderful. The interaction and integration of the campus with the beautiful city of Ann Arbor along the Huron River also excites me with it's natural resources, vibrant social life, and opportunities for a variety of experiences.
(497 words)
Anting, the first part of your essay that deals with your interactive experience with science at the age of 5 does not really serve a solid purpose in the essay. It is always best for you to get to the point when yo are writing to the reviewer. While I can understand why you would want to create an artistic introduction for your response, the reviewer does not have the time to waste reading about something that happened when you were 5 years old. It is not as relevant to your application as you might think.
By starting off immediately with "The University of Michigan first captured my interest in 8th grade at a school visit as I pictured the vibrant campus, spirited sports culture, and unique traditions. ", you immediately lay the foundation for what attracted you to Michigan for your college studies. The rest of your essay provides the required academic basis for your response and even opens up a window of opportunity for you to explain the kind of scientific research you may do at the university as an undergraduate. I suggest that you take advantage of the chance to do so.
Now, you need to make sure that you deliver only the information that the reviewer will be interested in reading about. That means keeping the focus of the essay solely on the academic requirements as indicated in the prompt. The last part of your essay that deals with the traditions of the university that you look forward to participating in is now out of place, just like your reference to your interest in science at the age of 5.
By removing the 2 irrelevant parts of the essay that you wrote, you will not only offer the proper response to the prompt, but also shorten the essay. These steps will ensure that the reviewer at least reads your essay to the very end so that your narrative can be used as part of the considerations for your application.
