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I was born into a global and diverse life - What can NYU offer you?



sage28 4 / 12  
Dec 28, 2014   #1
This essay is extremely rough right now, and I would appreciate any and all help. Thanks!

NYU is global, urban, inspired, smart, connected, and bold. What can NYU offer you, and what can you offer NYU? (200-400 words)

From the moment I was born, I was destined to live a global and diverse life, because I was born into one. My mother was born in Mexico, my grandmother was Cuban and grew up next door neighbors to Fidel Castro, and my grandfather was adopted, but born and raised in Liverpool, England. Traveling was a quintessential part of my mother's childhood, so she passed on this gift of cultural experience to my brother and myself. From the natives in the mountains of Machu Picchu to the children I met in Chay Lap, Vietnam, my entire life I have been immersed in the cultures of almost every continent in the world. Through traveling, I have not only learned about other cultures and how different life is outside of the U.S., but also how lucky and grateful I am to live in a country like the United States. I intend to bring this diversity and what I have learned from my travels along with me to NYU.

NYU is a school that offers the immense diversity and culture that I crave. Being in the heart of New York City, I would be surrounded by people from all over the globe, bringing with them their culture and knowledge of the world. NYU would offer me academic rigor and diverse culture, all in a city I've fallen in love with. I am also extremely intrigued by NYU's study abroad program. The amazing cities offered as well as what the experience alone would add to my studies, made me fall head over heels for NYU and the opportunities that the school brings. I would be honored to attend NYU for the next four years and continue to learn and grow.

vangiespen - / 4077  
Dec 28, 2014   #2
We don't need to learn about your biographical background in this statement. Just stick to the topic provided and deliver the best response that you can. Your essay currently wastes a lot of word count in describing the circumstances of your birth, which is not at all necessary in this discussion. Better develop the reasons why you chose to study at NYU. Don't confuse the city with the university. Talk about the university and its offerings. The city, is a backdrop and is irrelevant to the offerings of the university and how the university can help you academically and socially. You also need to clarify what you, as a person and as a student can bring to the university that will help enliven its academic and social landscape.
Coco0729 2 / 2  
Dec 29, 2014   #3
Hi, you miss the topic because it says "NYU is global, urban, inspired, smart, connected, and bold." Therefore, it is irrelevant to talk about your background information.

You must re-read the TOPIC again in order to write an outstanding essay!


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