Caring - UBC: "Tell us about who your are and what are you proud of?"

caring and supportive attitude

I asked my best friend to help me answer this question by briefly describing me, and she said, "When it comes to being a friend to someone, you are the most empathetic person I know, but when it comes to helping yourself, you are turning into the strictest parent I could imagine". After a while, I realized that she is correct. It might be that the caring and supportive attitude I obtained by being an older sister for four of my siblings reflects on my interactions with others, and exactingness to myself is the consequence of the understanding that I am in charge of everyone.

Many people would say they perceive me as a strong and confident individual, but it was not always that way. Before moving to Canada for secondary school, I was extremely vulnerable, but since I arrived the major changes within my personality occured. During the first year abroad, I had to adapt to living among diverse community, and in order to become more tolerant I taught myself to accept judgements.

By providing me with the opportunity to engage myself into a variety of team projects and volunteering, my school has helped me to become creative and adoptable, while the wide experience of organizing school events made me more responsible. From my teachers, I learned to work the hardest and be curious about every field of study. However, the most important of my inferences that I feel proud of is that even if the chance to succeed seems to be low, taking a risk is always worth it, so now I am entirely fearless. Bravery is a key to finding your way, that is why I value that quality within myself.

This is a good approach to the presentation. You asked your friend to actually help you respond to the question, which is why I could sense the honestly and impartial point of view being presented in that paragraph. However, in the part where you said "Many people would say", it would be better to use a specific group of people as referred to in the original prompt. You can say that your parents perceive you as such or, refer to your teachers or community group members since you are referring to secondary school in that section. Try to have a specific reference to what you are most proud of though. That has been lost in the discussion and has been weakened by having several, rather than a central focus / topic for that response paragraph.

Your essay reflects your honest opinions, making it really compelling and unique. You also did a really great job in discussing the various characteristics that define you and expand on the idea that you are still growing as a person.