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"Chase my love to secret of nature and philosophy" - Intellectual Goal



gdtbj2008 6 / 3  
Jan 7, 2009   #1
how your personal or academic interests relate to your intellectual or professional goals.

For many years I have kept an interest in making friends with people elder or younger, gregarious or introverted. They share different characters and backgrounds, attracting me to get to know of them, be acquainted with them, and I am always willing to listen to their stories.

Since I settled in Beijing, I have experienced a lot about the capital and its people here. My best friend, Harry, is nearly desperate for the job market recently. Harry is an ambitious MBA from the top business school in China. His birth in a remote village and graduation from a forgettable college did not affect him getting a job in an auditing institute assisting Goldman Sachs in IPO projects. Without satisfying, he quitted the job, returned to campus, and by effort step by step got close to his terminal----an investment bank, only to encounter the financial crisis. When investment banks shut the door for recruitment, Harry refuses to decline his standard for the job, only submitting applications for positions matching an excellent MBA, for he believes his value and never regrets his choice. The choice of the 28-year-old guy moves and inspired me greatly, especially to decide my major.

That is Harry's story, along with sixteen million stories about dream and perseverance in Beijing. I was wondering whether to major in Science & Engineering for long. Although I treated Mathematics and Physics most seriously and therefore harvested an appreciation of the fantastic world of nature science, my interest in various fields and some kind of fear hesitated me to be an engineer. But Harry' s story instructs me that it is worthwhile to chase my love to secret of nature and philosophy to solve practical problems although sometimes it does appear tough and awesome. I know I earn it.

Thanks in advance.

shine lee 1 / 34  
Jan 7, 2009   #2
They share who have different characters and backgrounds, attract me to get to know of them; and be acquainted with them, I am always willing to listen to their stories.

Although I treated Mathematics and Physics most seriously and therefore harvested an appreciation of the fantastic world of nature science, my interest in various fields and some kind of fear hesitated me to be an engineer. But Harry' s story instructs me that it is worthwhile to chase my love to secret of nature and philosophy to solve practical problems although sometimes it does appear tough and awesome This answers for your question,

I think that your essay got problem, the intro doesn't fit the entire paragraph.
You should revise or rewrite it.
sorry if my comment is harsh.
OP gdtbj2008 6 / 3  
Jan 7, 2009   #3
I haveta agree it is a failure, and this is one of my first completed essays together with the one about activities, which i feel couldnt be worse!

these days i'm busy writing essays for 4 colleges! I'm really happy to see my progress with your help!

so thank u so much again!
shine lee 1 / 34  
Jan 7, 2009   #4
let's see what I could do for you.
first I think you should identify clearly your personal or academic interests which's related to your intellectual or professional goals.(you should do it by your own because it would reveal more about you)

then relax and try writing (and try to write it) again :)
that may be effective, I understand your stress, I got the same too, and it worked for me
good luck!
P/s: when you have already identified, call us and we will help you if you need, good luck again :]
EF_Kevin 8 / 13052  
Jan 7, 2009   #5
I think it is important to focus on how your interests relate to your goals.

You do not talk very much about your specific interests and goals. Can you focus more on them? What you wrote about the lessons you learned from Harry's story is very meaningful, so you should keep it, but you should also tell how it relates to specific goals that you would like to accomplish.


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