Cliche image of kids holding hands under a rainbow - Yale Supplement

What would do with a free afternoon tomorrow?
I want to climb to the top of the green hills and sit there alone and quietly while thinking about how I see the world.

Recall a compliment you received that you especially value. What was it? From whom did it come?
"Mustafa is so independent that his parents don't even know what he is doing. He is on his way to great things." My friend's dad said that when he was lecturing my friend.

If you could witness one moment in history, what would it be and why?
I want to witness Malcolm X making holy pilgrimage to see how he reacted to the white people worshiping peacefully with others of different colors.

What do you wish you were better at being or doing?
I wish I was better at understanding girls' feelings.
If you were choosing students to form a Yale class, what question would you ask here that we have not?
There is more than one function of a paper clip. How would you use it?
Why Yale?
#1
When I see Yale as a diverse school, I don't see that cliché image of every kid from every race holding hands under a rainbow. I see different worlds colliding, and Yale achieves this in a unique way. During the famous football game against Harvard, the Yalies don't compete in spirit against Harvard, but they compete amongst themselves with their residential colleges. With such a unique way, I want to be a part of Yale and interact with different worlds through peculiar and friendly competition.

#2
I haven't done #2, but it's about why I chose Yale because of the many opportunities it offers such as their faculty researching on concepts that I'm interested in like Ronald Breaker's work on Ribozyme and riboswitch analysis.

Which do you think will be a better topic for the Why Yale question and impress the admission readers the most?

Probably go with #1 for it is uncommon. As for #2, I think Every other person writes about it. :)

I really like this:


Overall, you're a strong writer.
Good Luck in School :)

Help me with my Columbia Essay please! :))

I would go with the second one. Although you have demonstrated your firm writing technique and creativity on the first one, I think Yale will be more interested on the benefits that you can gain from them academically. I think that by elaborating on Breaker's work you can convince them further about your determination in studying Biology and how you think Yale can help you in achieving your goals.

I wish I was were better at understanding girls' feelings.

Thanks for helping me with my essay. :)

In the question 'Why Yale?' I think both are good, I think the first one is fine. But if you'll choose the second one it would be better to have it longer?

"During the famous football game against Harvard, the Yalies don't compete in spirit against Harvard, but they compete amongst themselves with their residential colleges." <--I think you need to work on this.

'What would do with a free afternoon tomorrow?' <--I don't know, I think you need a more interesting answer for this question.

I choose #1. Unique and shows more about you. I think they'll get an image of you academically from the rest of your application and/or recommendations.

Agree about the "lecturing" comment. How about "My friend's dad said this during a conversation with my friend."

Agree on the grammar with "were" instead of "was."

Love your paperclip question.

I slightly don't believe the first answer about your free afternoon, but I feel that in the context of the rest of your application I would definitely believe it (from reading your essays I get the sense that you are that kind of contemplative person) :)

"With such a unique way, I want to be a part of Yale and interact with different worlds through peculiar and friendly competition." With such a unique way...? I'm unsure about the meaning of that phrase. If you're saying what i think you're saying, try out "With such a unique atmosphere/attitude/etc."

All in all, I think this is wonderful.

I think you should go with number 1 as it is more original and thoughtful.