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Close relationships/Professors/Excellent facilities; Lehigh Supp: "Unique aspect"



mylesd 6 / 10  
Dec 27, 2012   #1
Prompt: What unique aspect of Lehigh most interests you?
I need some help editing. Please, feel free to comment and criticize.

One of the top schools in the nation, Lehigh University offers all of the benefits of a great college. Intimate relationships with professors, excellent facilities, and school spirit are all positive characteristics that are present at Lehigh. The aspect unique to Lehigh, which most interests me, is the environment.

Since I will be spending at least four years of my life in college, I have made it a priority to find a school that can be made into a home. The community at Lehigh is one of the most comforting ones and it appears to be a perfect match for anyone looking for a welcoming environment. Additionally, the student population is the perfect size. At right around 7,000 students, the university population is just over twice that of my high school but still not too large to get lost among all of the different faces.

The other unique aspect of the environment is the architecture. The magnificent buildings at Lehigh, like Packer Hall, inspire me as I look forward to majoring in architecture. Currently, I can only dream of designing structures comparable to those spread across the school's campus, however, with the help of Lehigh University, I will be as great as the architects that crafted the schools current environment.

The incomparable aspects that make Lehigh University so great are the friendly social environment and beautiful physical surroundings. Although some consider the city of Bethlehem to be in the shadows of Philadelphia and New York, Lehigh University remains a beacon of higher education.

ylimewc 3 / 8  
Dec 28, 2012   #2
school's campus, however, with the

Maybe change to "...campus; however,..." or "...campus. However..." to make the sentence more concise

I will be as great as the architects

I'd suggest changing to "...I hope to become as great..."

Although some consider the city of Bethlehem to be in the shadows of Philadelphia and New York, Lehigh University remains a beacon of higher education.

Great metaphor! A perfect ending to the essay.

Overall, great essay! Best of luck
OP mylesd 6 / 10  
Dec 28, 2012   #3
Thanks! I like both of those suggestions.
How does this look?
"Currently, I can only dream of designing structures comparable to those spread across the school's campus; however, with the help of Lehigh University, I will be a step closer to being as great as the architects that crafted the schools current environment ."


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