Hi, Guys! I was wondering if you can help me edit this essay. And does this make sense?
Please provide a statement (250 words minimum) that addresses your reasons for transferring and the objectives you hope to achieve.
High school counselors and teachers have warned all their students that college is harder and is nothing like high school, and they were absolutely right. Without taking heed of this warning, I have dug myself a hole that seems to be difficult to get out of. As a former student of the University of California, Santa Barbara, I have received mediocre grades from that school because of my less-than-stellar performance. I have always thought that college was going to be just as simple as high school, but they are worlds apart. College teaches you about the pressures of real life, and unfortunately, it got the best of me. Since freshman year, my grades have been slipping tremendously that my average GPA yielded with less than a 2.6. With grades like these, I would be lucky if I could find a decent job with my background. With failing grades I realized that I have to start fresh at a different college, and the best place to start is at a local community college.
When I dropped out of UCSB, I remembered what my old teacher said to me back at high school. He said that I lack the experience and the knowledge to survive in a 4-year institution, and that I wasn't ready. I was insulted when he told me this, but looking back at my failures, he was absolutely right. They say that you should always listen to your mother because they know what's best for you, but in this case, you should also listen to your teachers. He told me that in order for me to understand how college operates, I needed to attend community college, where they can give me the information I need in order to transfer to a 4-year institution. I followed his advice, and started taking classes at community college. Transitioning from a 4-year institution to a lower-level institution hurt my parents' pride, because they expected so much from their child. When your parents put their faith and trust in you, they expect that you succeed. If things had gone right, I would have been the first son ever to graduate from college in time, but unfortunately that has to be postponed for now.
While I was at community college, it provided many advantages for me. The class sizes were small and the teachers helped me to slowly transition myself from high school to college. Also, my time there has helped me improve on my studies, which in turn, increased my GPA. My intended major has always been Computer Science, because this subject is a huge passion of mine. I have always been fascinated about computer coding and wondered how that can assist in our everyday lives. Currently, my goal is to transfer to a college where they can help me answer this mystery, and to help me gain a better understanding about this subject. I know that I can succeed with a degree in my hand and I want to make my parents proud of me. After graduating from college, I want to be a programmer in the future either working for Microsoft, Cisco, or a game designer company. When you're a college student, you try to think long-term, and I believe this is going to come true. Even though I have made mistakes, I know that by transferring, it can give me a second chance. The error of my past is the wisdom of my future.
Transferring to another college is difficult; especially since this country is still in a recession even to this day, which makes securing a position at a school to be very difficult. Even though my GPA is lower than I expected, I can assure you that my passion for college is undeniable. Finding a major that I am interested in, I know that I can be successful in the future, now that I know what I am doing. My teacher in high school warned me about this situation, and I ignored his advice. First comes the test, second comes the lesson. Now that I have learned my lesson, I know that I can do things the correct way. I would like to think that I have achieved many, but my experience with education does not end with completing elementary, middle, and high school, in fact it is only the beginning. College is going to be the ultimate test and my future is going to reflect upon my actions during this time. My mistakes have held me down, but my resolve to learn the correct way has helped me pick myself up. Throughout the rest of my life, I will continue to learn through my own experiences, learn what life has given me, and I will also offer my own unique perspective to the world and the people around me.
Please provide a statement (250 words minimum) that addresses your reasons for transferring and the objectives you hope to achieve.
High school counselors and teachers have warned all their students that college is harder and is nothing like high school, and they were absolutely right. Without taking heed of this warning, I have dug myself a hole that seems to be difficult to get out of. As a former student of the University of California, Santa Barbara, I have received mediocre grades from that school because of my less-than-stellar performance. I have always thought that college was going to be just as simple as high school, but they are worlds apart. College teaches you about the pressures of real life, and unfortunately, it got the best of me. Since freshman year, my grades have been slipping tremendously that my average GPA yielded with less than a 2.6. With grades like these, I would be lucky if I could find a decent job with my background. With failing grades I realized that I have to start fresh at a different college, and the best place to start is at a local community college.
When I dropped out of UCSB, I remembered what my old teacher said to me back at high school. He said that I lack the experience and the knowledge to survive in a 4-year institution, and that I wasn't ready. I was insulted when he told me this, but looking back at my failures, he was absolutely right. They say that you should always listen to your mother because they know what's best for you, but in this case, you should also listen to your teachers. He told me that in order for me to understand how college operates, I needed to attend community college, where they can give me the information I need in order to transfer to a 4-year institution. I followed his advice, and started taking classes at community college. Transitioning from a 4-year institution to a lower-level institution hurt my parents' pride, because they expected so much from their child. When your parents put their faith and trust in you, they expect that you succeed. If things had gone right, I would have been the first son ever to graduate from college in time, but unfortunately that has to be postponed for now.
While I was at community college, it provided many advantages for me. The class sizes were small and the teachers helped me to slowly transition myself from high school to college. Also, my time there has helped me improve on my studies, which in turn, increased my GPA. My intended major has always been Computer Science, because this subject is a huge passion of mine. I have always been fascinated about computer coding and wondered how that can assist in our everyday lives. Currently, my goal is to transfer to a college where they can help me answer this mystery, and to help me gain a better understanding about this subject. I know that I can succeed with a degree in my hand and I want to make my parents proud of me. After graduating from college, I want to be a programmer in the future either working for Microsoft, Cisco, or a game designer company. When you're a college student, you try to think long-term, and I believe this is going to come true. Even though I have made mistakes, I know that by transferring, it can give me a second chance. The error of my past is the wisdom of my future.
Transferring to another college is difficult; especially since this country is still in a recession even to this day, which makes securing a position at a school to be very difficult. Even though my GPA is lower than I expected, I can assure you that my passion for college is undeniable. Finding a major that I am interested in, I know that I can be successful in the future, now that I know what I am doing. My teacher in high school warned me about this situation, and I ignored his advice. First comes the test, second comes the lesson. Now that I have learned my lesson, I know that I can do things the correct way. I would like to think that I have achieved many, but my experience with education does not end with completing elementary, middle, and high school, in fact it is only the beginning. College is going to be the ultimate test and my future is going to reflect upon my actions during this time. My mistakes have held me down, but my resolve to learn the correct way has helped me pick myself up. Throughout the rest of my life, I will continue to learn through my own experiences, learn what life has given me, and I will also offer my own unique perspective to the world and the people around me.