Please critique my short answer. any advice is welcome . thanks!!
Community service
Dark rings under sunken eyes, ragged clothing, and muddy hands pleaded for his sympathy. "Keep your candy," my father said as he handed the boy a couple of coins. With a toothless smile the boy thanked him and vanished within the mist and traffic of Lima.
With time I have realized that more than a couple of coins are needed to make a difference. This is why I got involved with community service, an activity through which I was able to build houses for those affected by the Ica earthquake, provide religious education for the indigenous tribes of the Iquitos jungle, and donate school supplies and basic goods for dozens of public schools around Peru. Helping soon became more than a social obligation, it became an avocation through which I have found fulfillment and rejoice, a passion I wish to develop throughout my life and inculcate in my surroundings.
Community service
Dark rings under sunken eyes, ragged clothing, and muddy hands pleaded for his sympathy. "Keep your candy," my father said as he handed the boy a couple of coins. With a toothless smile the boy thanked him and vanished within the mist and traffic of Lima.
With time I have realized that more than a couple of coins are needed to make a difference. This is why I got involved with community service, an activity through which I was able to build houses for those affected by the Ica earthquake, provide religious education for the indigenous tribes of the Iquitos jungle, and donate school supplies and basic goods for dozens of public schools around Peru. Helping soon became more than a social obligation, it became an avocation through which I have found fulfillment and rejoice, a passion I wish to develop throughout my life and inculcate in my surroundings.