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Common App Essay: It's the journey, not the destination



basketball 7 / 34  
Jan 15, 2013   #1
For me, humans are goal-oriented creature. At any times in our lives, we all have some different goals to reach. This is my philosophy of living since I was a child. I know I am not the only one who has this way of thinking. Many of my friends said why they would go to school if not to graduate. My mother once told me that she wished she could give birth to me without the 9 months of torturing. After all, who would do something just for the sake of doing it? With that belief, I have created a goal for myself: study abroad in the United States.

July 16th, 2012, I have travelled to my destination. I conquered the last obstacle of my journey on that day: getting a visa. After two years since I first decided to walk on this path, I have finally reached an end. Just when I walked out from the U.S embassy, I could feel the happiness that bursts out from my chest. My family invited many relatives to come for my celebration dinner. Everyone cheered for me, and I felt that I am the happiest girl in the world at that moment. Nevertheless, suddenly I feel an emptiness within me. I asked myself "What now"? After dinner, I decided to take a walk around Hoan Kiem Lake, a charming lake that locates at the very heart of Ha Noi. As I walked, I could feel the wind blew hard to thrust back the hotness of summer. My mind harmonized with the wind and wandered back into my past two years.

After my flashback, I remembered the quote that I have never been able to agree with it: "It's the journey, not the destination". Looking back at the last two years, I realize coming to the U.S does not define me the student I am as much as all the experiences I have encountered during the path. I am unique neither because I am Vietnamese nor because I come to the U.S to study. The learning, struggling, succeeding, failing are what differentiate me as an individual. The times I could not understand the TOEFL test taught me to try harder. While I got the U.S visa, I learnt that all hard works would eventually pay off. The journey along the way teaches me many lessons to become a better person.

I learn that to travel is better than to arrive. Now I am ready to travel the next part of my life. The next four years in my life will be another destination that I need to reach. This time, I will not hurry for the future. I will live in each moment for what it is. I will make many lifetime friends, study what I am passion about, and learn knowledge not just from professors but everyone around. I will live so that when I graduate, I do not just have a degree but many valuable experiences that come with it.

My essay is due tomorrow at midnight, any help is appreciated. Thank you very much :)

tutu51595 6 / 19  
Jan 15, 2013   #2
-My mother once told me that she wished she could give birth to me without the 9 months of torture
-July 16th, 2012, I reached my destination.
-I decided to take a walk around Hoan Kiem Lake, a charming lake that is at the very heart of Ha Noi, Vietnam

I thought the essay was very well done. Good job!
OP basketball 7 / 34  
Jan 15, 2013   #3
Thank you :)
Anyone else can help me. This is due today so any help is appreciated.
brie270 2 / 1  
Jan 15, 2013   #4
I really like this essay and besides the mistakes already mentioned, it sounded great, the tone was fantastic and everything flowed!
fsolano94 16 / 28  
Jan 15, 2013   #5
I also liked the flow of the essay as well. It was really persuasive and illustrated your goals. I didn't find any other errors than those already mentioned so good luck with your college search.

Help with mine if you get the chance

mine = 500 word essay Colorado @ Boulder


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