When I was offered a job at a local Japanese restaurant, I was thrilled. I had just returned from Japan and was excited to put my Japanese to use. Languages are my passion; I had grown up speaking English and German, learned Japanese as an exchange student and am now in my fourth year of taking Chinese. Through learning languages, I can relate to more people and gain insight into their cultures. Sushi Tei had an interesting assortment of customers and employees. Not only could I chat with the Japanese businessmen who came for lunch, I could listen in on conversations between my Chinese coworkers, learn the basics of Thai from a fellow waitress and pick up bits of Spanish while teaching ESL to the Mexican dishwasher. While waiting tables, I became proficient in the art of switching languages; taking orders in Japanese at one table, English at another and then making requests to the chef in Chinese. This job helped me become open-minded and appreciative of the diversity in my community.
I'm trying to think of a better concluding sentence. Thank you very much!
Wow that is quite some talent there. You are going on to your sixth language! I am on my 4th year of Japanese right now.
As for the last sentence, you can try to turn it into two sentences, and give an example of how you personally applied what you learned working at Sushi Tei to your every day life. Take the reader from the restaurant and into your daily life. It shows admissions that you are able to absorb what you learn and successfully apply it to your life, which is important because colleges want students who can put what they learn to use. What have you recently done that reflects on your new open-minded outlook and appreciation of diversity?
I believe this is well written. You do a great job of "selling" your talents to the college and I could really see how diverse you are
This is amazing, good job :)
the only thing the i would advise is this sentence: Languages are my passion should be changed to Learning different languages is my passion because you like the learning and application of it rather than the actual language itself.
Good luck :)
I love how you incorporated your love of languages into a short response that was supposed to be about just a work experience.
However, I feel like you shifted your focus from work to language, and then from language to work a bit too suddenly. Without reading at the title, I would have not known whether this essay was supposed to be about your love of different languages or about your job.
Here is just one correction I would make:
I had grown up speaking English and German,replace comma with periodI learned Japanese as an exchange student and am now in my fourth year of taking Chinese.
Overall, I really like your short response and I am so impressed at your language ability! I'm jealous too!
I would be so happy if you could look at my Yale supplement. Thanks:)
Thank you, that's great advise! Right now I'm struggling to fit everything within 1000 characters but I'll try to incorporate that in somehow.
Thanks! I fixed that. :)
To help shorten, use shorter strong synonyms to stay within the 1000 character limit.