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Why did i cry ? ; Significant reality/What Matters Most



Shamri 1 / 2  
Dec 25, 2012   #1
The only rational action was to resume my sleep, yet I chose to prioritize God's demand for spiritual commitment over my desire for physical comfort. Nevertheless, I came to regret that decision when I entered the Sacred Mosque. Millions of Muslims were ready to submit themselves to God through the Subh prayer, especially those who stationed themselves in close proximity with Kaabah. Frantically searching for a space to fulfill my spiritual obligation, i realized the futility of my desire to pray in front of the Noble Cube. In that exasperating moment, I committed what most could call an irrational act - I hoped for a miracle.

I saw no sign of divine intervention to aid me in my endeavor and as I began to retreat, a fellow Muslim grabbed me by the shoulder and placed me next to his side. While the Imam led the Subh prayer, tears of joy and sorrow rolled down my cheek with each Koranic verse recited by him. Sadness for the mistakes I had done and happiness for realizing them before it was too late. After the prayer, the person who helped me hugged me and murmured several Arabic words. I did not know what he was saying but I did know that he was consoling me. The comfort and solace he provided made me cry again.

Being alive was the most significant reality of my life because it meant and defined my existence. With that narcissistic mentality, I became engrossed with the notion of being a self-made man. More than engrossed: obsessed. I even took Machiavellian approaches in life exploiting other people to further my own interest while alienating myself from social affiliations to prevent dependency. But the tears healed me.

Why did i cry ? I did not cry because of God's benevolence nor did I cry because of the random act of kindness. I cried because I came to realize that I should not be and was never alone. Now, I am sure the companionship life offers matters most.

Sabahat 3 / 6  
Dec 25, 2012   #2
Its a deeply moving essay and as a fellow Muslim easy to grasp the idea as well, the grammar is flawless to me. One thing though is that you should probably explain Islamic terms such as: subh prayer, Imam, Kaabah because your intended reader might not know these words. otherwise its a good piece of writing :)
OP Shamri 1 / 2  
Dec 25, 2012   #3
Thank you :) Is there any way for me to improve it ? Perhaps the structure or the message. Maybe the flow of the essay
Sabahat 3 / 6  
Dec 26, 2012   #4
In the last sentence of your first paragraph you said you hoped for a miracle but in your essay i couldnt really understand for what so maybe you can elaborate on that.

Second paragraph

Sadness for the mistakes I had done and happiness for realizing them before it was too late.

You say that you made some mistakes and you felt bad. It is quite sudden because you dont mention anything such as mistakes or remorse earlier in the essay so mayb you want to talk about you "mistakes" or "moral weaknesses" earlier so that the reader can understand your feelings during the prayer, in my opinion.
zdv 12 / 68  
Dec 26, 2012   #5
although i could spiritually connect to this essay, it was hard for me to understand all the muslim words you used. so i think you should explain them or use more common words for them. otherwise, it is a very well written essay.


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