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My current college does not meet desired expectations. So why I want attend Virginia Tech?



headduty 1 / -  
Jan 6, 2016   #1
Hey I need some grammar check and and helpful tips to make this essay better please!! Thanks

Prompt: State why you wish to leave your present college and attend Virginia Tech.

I feel that my current college in Conway does not send out the type of message I would like to get from a university. It seems as if they want me to live in the future, rather than invent it. I would like to attend Virginia Tech because I know that the environment alone will push me to my full potential. I've heard from multiple people that attend or have attended Virginia Tech that everything from the professors to your peers will motivate and prepare you to be the best at whatever it is you want to do. I hope to one day be a major role in a successful company and hopefully start a business that rivals even Apple or Google in its success. Personally, I feel that my college in Conway is not preparing me to be that person I wish to be in the future. My goals are too big for a university like that. Virginia Tech's academics are far more advanced than my current universities and all the resources available to the students will really assist me in reaching my goals. For example, I plan to join a business fraternity to help me excel in all business related endeavors.I know that going to Virginia Tech will make me want to be there everyday of each semester and have me counting down the days while I'm on break until I get to be back on the beautiful campus again!

justivy03 - / 2265  
Jan 6, 2016   #2
Ibrahim, I would like to share my remarks and hopefully enhance the grammar of the essay.

- I feel that my current college in Conway does not send out the type of message I would like to get from a university. It seems as if they want me to live in the future, rather than invent it.( Ibrahim, when writing an essay to justify your decision as to why you choose the university you choose, you don't have to talk ill or highlight the not so good aspect of the university, remember is a part of your academic journey )

- I would like to attend Virginia Tech because I know thathas the environment
- that without a doubt,alone will push me to my full potential.
- I've heard from multiple people that attend or have attendedFrom my research, Virginia Tech
- thathas everything
- you to be the best at whatever it is you want to doyour chosen field .
- Personally, I feel that my college in Conway is not preparing me to be that person I wish to be in the future. My goals are too big for a university like that.( this sentence is not necessary )

There you have it Ibrahim, I hope my remarks helped.


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