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'My dream' - why columbia



sarahadams 11 / 22  
Oct 31, 2011   #1
THE QUESTION IS WHY DO YOU WANT TO ATTENED COLUMBIA UNIVERSTIY?

On November 4, 2008 people all around the world were standing on their toes, waiting for seconds that seemed to be like minutes, waiting for minutes that seemed to be hours, and hours that seemed to like days, just waiting to witness history that was about to be made. On November 4, 2008 President Barak Hussein Obama was elected to be the President of the United States of America. That moment was one of those moments you needed to see in order to believe that the world might start to change, change in a beneficial way instead of a harmful way. The people of America and the world wanted changes which lead President Barak Obama to be elected as president.

Being a curious person that I am I was researching about President Barak Obama. I wanted to know what made him the person that he is, what encouraged him to become the first African American president, what made him such a great speaker and what made him such a great leader. I read that he attended Columbia University and received a Political Science degree. Columbia University has such an amazing attitude towards diversity, new ideas, studies, clubs, and students Attending Columbia University would be a dream comes true for me, I want to become that great leader, that great speaker, and have the same courage that President Barak Obama had when he ran for president. If Barak Obamas dream was to become the President of the United States of America then my dream to attend Columbia University might just be the same.

argentum 3 / 9  
Oct 31, 2011   #2
I'm not a good writer but please let me review your essay. Sorry if I'm somehow wrong.

THE QUESTION IS WHY DO YOU WANT TO ATTENEDATTEND COLUMBIA UNIVERSTIY?

I think your writing is exaggerated and weird, especially the last sentence. I am sorry to say this, but your reason to attend Columbia University doesn't sound sensible to me. I think you should focus on the program offered, not the alumni.


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