I am an international student and my grammar is terrible.Sugestions,comments and critiques are welcome Please help!! thank you~
also, i need to cut about 20 words out I have no idea
ESSAY #2: In an essay of 300 words or less, choose one extracurricular activity, work experience or community service project from the list you provided on the application and explain why you initially chose it, why you continued with it, and how you benefited from it.
After struggling with English for six years, I realized that I could not even speak. Thus, I decided to immerse myself in a thoroughly English-speaking atmosphere like English Corner, as a good countermeasure for all the year I spent speaking Chinese. In grade 10, I was selected to be the leader of the school English Corner.
At first, I felt uncomfortable at making conversation in such occasions, serious yet informal. What always happened was that, everyone seated around a chat-table, eyes staring at me and mouths shut, then I felt compelled to break the ice. Operating became much easier as I gained more experience. In order to appease everyone's uneasy mood, topics that I started with were always as affable as how to negotiate with a tough-going teacher, and sometimes I even helped to proofread their Social Study essays. With some encouragement and practice, almost all members were able to speak coherently, and later, their teachers were amazed at their significant improvements. Most importantly, I found enthusiasm towards my job. In order to recruit more people, I surveyed people's views and ideas about English Corner, devoted my self-study time to making advertising posters, browsed on topics and games on weekend that I thought would be intriguing. In that time, more and more people were willing to participate, and with our club slogan " We Will English You", our participants turned every corner surrounds them into a "English Corner". I realized English Corner was not simply a place for people to have casual talks but a place where I found a different aspect of myself after putting in passion and effort in which I was blissful and energetic by helping others.
also, i need to cut about 20 words out I have no idea
ESSAY #2: In an essay of 300 words or less, choose one extracurricular activity, work experience or community service project from the list you provided on the application and explain why you initially chose it, why you continued with it, and how you benefited from it.
After struggling with English for six years, I realized that I could not even speak. Thus, I decided to immerse myself in a thoroughly English-speaking atmosphere like English Corner, as a good countermeasure for all the year I spent speaking Chinese. In grade 10, I was selected to be the leader of the school English Corner.
At first, I felt uncomfortable at making conversation in such occasions, serious yet informal. What always happened was that, everyone seated around a chat-table, eyes staring at me and mouths shut, then I felt compelled to break the ice. Operating became much easier as I gained more experience. In order to appease everyone's uneasy mood, topics that I started with were always as affable as how to negotiate with a tough-going teacher, and sometimes I even helped to proofread their Social Study essays. With some encouragement and practice, almost all members were able to speak coherently, and later, their teachers were amazed at their significant improvements. Most importantly, I found enthusiasm towards my job. In order to recruit more people, I surveyed people's views and ideas about English Corner, devoted my self-study time to making advertising posters, browsed on topics and games on weekend that I thought would be intriguing. In that time, more and more people were willing to participate, and with our club slogan " We Will English You", our participants turned every corner surrounds them into a "English Corner". I realized English Corner was not simply a place for people to have casual talks but a place where I found a different aspect of myself after putting in passion and effort in which I was blissful and energetic by helping others.