Unanswered [5] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Undergraduate   % width   Posts: 6


My English teacher, Ms. Pearson, someone that has impacted my life- UT



Soji Skulls 2 / 5  
Jul 21, 2011   #1
My prompt is to write about someone who has impacted my life and explain why and how they have.

Here is my essay. Can you tell me if it is any good. If so, could you point out some errors.:

People usually mention a person that they met early in their lives when you ask them to mention somebody that has impacted their lives. Well, not me. I actually met the person that has impacted my life relatively late in life. That person is my English teacher, Ms. Pearson. She was one of the only teachers that, through watching her, taught me how to be patient, caring, and empathetic. She has only been my teacher for about two years, but in these two years she has definitely impacted my life and even helped me decide what occupation that I would like to enter into, teaching. She is one of the best teachers that I have had because she applies herself differently depending on the student and the student's needs. With this quality, she has both impacted me and influenced me because it shows that she is versatile and that is something that I yearn to be.

I chose my English teacher, Ms. Pearson, because she is compassionate, and I have not seen many teachers like her. When one person in the class does not comprehend what is being taught, but everybody else does, she will make time to ensure that that one person does comprehend it before the class is given a test. She is also very organized and she arranges all of the assignments that she gives at the right times so that the student does not feel overwhelmed by all of the work. She is good at pacing herself and the class because she knows what subjects should be spread throughout the year so that we will remember more thoroughly and which subjects are simple and only need a week's worth of time. For example, we spent the whole year in 10th grade on word roots, prefixes, and suffixes. If we had spent a shorter amount of time on it, I most likely would have forgotten it. This shows that Ms. Pearson did not only impact my life, but she also impacted my education.

Before I met Ms Pearson, I wasn't really sure what I wanted to do with my life. In earlier years, I had my eyes set on being a teacher, but one of my past teachers told me that that wasn't the occupation for me because teachers didn't get paid that much and there were so many occupations out there that were open to me. That teacher convinced me to not be a teacher, so I went through a number of phases where I wanted to be different things. I guess you maybe wondering how I finally ended up with teaching. Well, that was all because of Ms. Pearson. She showed such a joy in teaching and brought that same joy to those she was teaching that she helped instill my dream of being a teacher. In conclusion, my English teacher, Ms. Pearson has impacted my life in many ways and she is also an example of the type of teacher that I would like to be in the future.

WBStudent 2 / 4  
Jul 21, 2011   #2
I think that its great and explains how she has impacted you. My only suggestion would be to start out the essay with an anecdote or story of an experience that you have had with Ms. Pearson. Then you can tie in the rest of the essay with the anecdote, making the flow a little smoother. Other then that, well done!
EF_Kevin 8 / 13053  
Jul 23, 2011   #4
People usually mention a person that they met early in their lives when you ask them to mention somebody that has impacted their lives. Well, not me.

I like this introduction!

... relatively late recently. ----I changed it, because ther term "late in life" usually refers to old age.

With this quality, she has both impacted me and influenced me because it shows that she is versatile, and that is something that I yearn to be.

... because teachers didn't get paid that much and there were so many occupations out there that were open to me. -----Well, teachers CAN get paid a lot if they supplement their income by creating educational products, blogging, etc. Be creative, and you can make money!

That teacher convinced me to not be a teacher, so I went through a number of phases where I wanted to be different things. I guess you maybe wondering how I finally ended up with teaching. Well, that was all because of Ms. Pearson. No, not wondering; you just explained it.

This essay is eloquent, clear, and... I love your writing style! However, the content is rather simplistic. I think you should revise this essay so that it includes some DETAILS about your unique plan.

For example, google this: philosophy of education
OP Soji Skulls 2 / 5  
Jul 23, 2011   #5
EF_Kevin
Thanks for taking time out to give me some input on my essay. You're a life saver.

I was also wondering how can I tell them about my unique plan if they want to know about a person that has impacted me and in what ways can I make my essay less simplistic?
EF_Kevin 8 / 13053  
Jul 25, 2011   #6
how can I tell them about my unique plan if they want to know about a person that has impacted me

That is the challenge! See, the esay will not be simplistic at all if you USE THIS DISCUSSION of an important person ... use this discussion as an OPPORTUNITY to help the reader understand and appreciate what you are all about.

See what I mean? The person you choose to discuss ... you choose this person because of what she represents to you. The person you choose and the way you discuss her are going to tell the reader a lot about how focused you are on carrying out your plan.

:-)


Home / Undergraduate / My English teacher, Ms. Pearson, someone that has impacted my life- UT
Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳