Fight for the cure- Wake Forest short essay

What idea most challenges you

Wandering through the crowded mall corridors I heard a disembodied voice roar, "The iPhone 5 is set to launch this July." Turing my head to identify the shouting culprit, I watched other bystanders do the same. Nonetheless, unable to uncover who released the excited squeal, I allowed my feet to guide my path once again. However, I had only traveled a few paces before a woman scoffed, "technology" as she turned to leave. Gazing at this stranger, I wondered why she expressed such contempt for technology. This unknown woman compelled me to question the very life force for society's teenagers, technology, by uttering one word and the wearing a Fight for the Cure t-shirt. I began to question how advancements in technology can constantly be achieved but there still be no cure for cancer.

I really need help on this as I don't like it much and ideas on how to make it better?

What is the word limit?

For this short answer, I feel like you are not really focused on a topic. You started out with the Iphone 5 intro and then ending with "cancer." I especially do not get the connection between the woman and the word "technology", too (try saying why you feel contempt for technology). I think that you should clarify this response more. If you have reached your word limit, then try focusing on how thinking about cancer is challenging for you (possibly think of a different introduction). You might want to elaborate more on this part: *I wondered why she expressed such contempt for technology. This unknown woman compelled me to question the very life force for society's teenagers, technology, by uttering one word and the wearing a Fight for the Cure t-shirt. I began to question how advancements in technology can constantly be achieved but there still be no cure for cancer* What questions did you have in mind? etc.