What is important to you? And why? (maximum 250 words)
"What would life be if we had no courage to attempt anything?" - Vincent Van Gogh
Taking initiative is important for a meaningful and interesting life. In order to understand society and the world around us, we have to subject ourselves to different experiences and adversities. By always sticking to the familiar and not taking risks, one can become every sheltered and lack valuable social or life skills.
When I was younger, I was terrified of trying new things because I feared failure and rejection. However, by not broadening my horizons, I felt that I was not progressing as a person and lacked a purpose in life. In middle school, I finally challenged myself to do something out of my comfort zone: run for class president. Though I was unsuccessful in acquiring the position, I felt like I succeeded because I was able to learn a substantial lesson from the experience: It is necessary to be indifferent to success or failure and I instead should focus on how I can better myself. It is critical to not be discouraged by failures and persevere and since then, I began to immerse myself in different experiences and take initiative to grasp any opportunities that are presented to me.
Taking various initiatives in life matters to me because it allows me to learn valuable lessons that can be useful in my later life. By pursuing a variety of experiences, I can constantly improve and grow as an individual.
Please let me know if I have answered the question correctly. Thank you in advance for any feedback!
Holt Educational Consultant - / 14,430 4691
Reviewers really dislike applicants who open their responses with a quote from a well known figure. While you think it makes you come across as smart and well read, what the reviewer sees is someone incapable of presenting himself in an interesting manner. So you rely on a quotation from someone else to create a possible hook for your essay. It is always better to avoid using quotes from other people and just jumping into the discussion using your own words.
Your second paragraph, your own words about why initiative is important to you was far more interesting and more effective in introducing your personality or mindset to the reviewer. It worked very well and did not need the Van Gogh quote to help it become relevant to your statement response.
It is important that you use a successful initiative activity in the presentation. You want to come across a winner in the eyes of the reviewer. Work on building that image up by showing a concern for something, then successfully taking the initiative to resolve the situation, problem, or issue on hand. Your response is a bit scattered because this is just a draft. Using my comments, you should be able to develop a better suited response.