Hi, Guys. I would really appreciate some feedback on my NYU supplemental essay. Please be brutally honest, as I want to make sure the essay is as close to perfection as possible. The prompt is:
NYU is global, urban, inspired, smart, connected, and bold. What can NYU offer you, and what can you offer NYU? (200-400 words)
He looked at me, completely bemused, when I could not tell him what my permanent home address was. I could not blame him for his reaction. Every kid knew his or her address. Truth is, I simply did not know. This particular event took place when I was in the fourth grade, and by then, I had already been to five schools in different parts of the world. I have already had more addresses than some people do in their lifetime. Yet, none of them could be considered permanent.
Up until the age of twelve when my father decided to settle down so I can complete my secondary years in one school, I had travelled all over the world. I have been exposed to several different cultures and have met people from all corners of the globe. This exposure has allowed me to broaden my mind and has allowed me to respect beliefs and other ways of life.
NYU's mission statement states that NYU wants "to promote... ...an inclusive and diverse community." I believe that I will be able to add to this diverse community and provide another fresh set of lens to view the world with. By travelling the world, I have become open-minded, and I believe I can be a positive addition to NYU's diverse cultures.
Intramurals. Amateur Astronomers Association. Theater. The question is, what can't NYU offer me? In my eyes, NYU offers a unique university lifestyle in an urban setting - something that I yearn. NYU's setting has allowed for a diverse student body to be formed. This is something I can consider a privilege to be a part of. From Greek life to varsity fencing to Tisch film courses. Students in NYU are exposed to an infinite amount of opportunities both academically and socially.
NYU encourages individuality through its Liberal Studies Program and Gallatin School of Individualized Study. Infused with global focus and a multicultural understanding, these programs can offer a student to develop skills for success in today's interconnected world. These programs of study truly makes NYU a unique place for academics and it produces holistic learners - something I aspire to be.
To sum up, NYU will offer me an unrivalled education, it will offer me a chance to interact with people of diverse cultures, and it will open the doors to a brighter future.
NYU is global, urban, inspired, smart, connected, and bold. What can NYU offer you, and what can you offer NYU? (200-400 words)
He looked at me, completely bemused, when I could not tell him what my permanent home address was. I could not blame him for his reaction. Every kid knew his or her address. Truth is, I simply did not know. This particular event took place when I was in the fourth grade, and by then, I had already been to five schools in different parts of the world. I have already had more addresses than some people do in their lifetime. Yet, none of them could be considered permanent.
Up until the age of twelve when my father decided to settle down so I can complete my secondary years in one school, I had travelled all over the world. I have been exposed to several different cultures and have met people from all corners of the globe. This exposure has allowed me to broaden my mind and has allowed me to respect beliefs and other ways of life.
NYU's mission statement states that NYU wants "to promote... ...an inclusive and diverse community." I believe that I will be able to add to this diverse community and provide another fresh set of lens to view the world with. By travelling the world, I have become open-minded, and I believe I can be a positive addition to NYU's diverse cultures.
Intramurals. Amateur Astronomers Association. Theater. The question is, what can't NYU offer me? In my eyes, NYU offers a unique university lifestyle in an urban setting - something that I yearn. NYU's setting has allowed for a diverse student body to be formed. This is something I can consider a privilege to be a part of. From Greek life to varsity fencing to Tisch film courses. Students in NYU are exposed to an infinite amount of opportunities both academically and socially.
NYU encourages individuality through its Liberal Studies Program and Gallatin School of Individualized Study. Infused with global focus and a multicultural understanding, these programs can offer a student to develop skills for success in today's interconnected world. These programs of study truly makes NYU a unique place for academics and it produces holistic learners - something I aspire to be.
To sum up, NYU will offer me an unrivalled education, it will offer me a chance to interact with people of diverse cultures, and it will open the doors to a brighter future.