I require help. I need to know exactly how genuine my essay sounds along with what and how I can improve it. Say, for example, if there is a viewpoint or aspect which I should add. I need to condense my essay to 300 words. currently its 364 words.
3rd April, 2011- I remember entering a room full of my seniors engrossed in a heated discussion. Their jargon flew over my head as I struggled to make sense of their talk. This was the core group of my school's Model UN team and I had been initially surprised at the invite to join the research team. However, I also realised this could be an opportunity to overcome my shy and introvert nature. As it turned out over the next three 3 years ,MUN not only gave me the biggest achievement of my life, but also a pathway to contribute to my school. It was a stepping stone to everything I ever wanted to be, both as a human and a delegate. The feel of the microphone and the attention of the audience was exactly what an introvert like me needed. I knew the importance of being able to express my views and seized this enabling environment.
During my involvement with MUN, I have been able to successfully merge geo-polictical and geo-economical knowledge with my leadership and public speaking skills to attain the position of head of delegation. It was a major achievement for my school,team-mates and myself when we won the Outstanding Delegation award at La Martniere Calcutta Model United nations, India.
Aside from the tangible achievement, MUN has been a great catalyst in my passion for economics. The intensive research on various nations has helped me learn about the role finance and economics plays in determining foreign policy. Owing to such exposure, I now raise debates in class on matters both in and out of scope of syllabus and the outcomes of such debates act as a whetstone to my knowledge in economics.
If MUN had provided me with so many qualities then I , too, was able to provide my school with a calm and methodical leader in me who was able to inspire his juniors into winning their very first Best Delegation in Hyderabad, India. Truly, it has been a symbiotic relationship for it is through this journey that I accomplished my most important feat and now I am able to contribute by sharing knowledge with future generations of participants.
WORDS-364
3rd April, 2011- I remember entering a room full of my seniors engrossed in a heated discussion. Their jargon flew over my head as I struggled to make sense of their talk. This was the core group of my school's Model UN team and I had been initially surprised at the invite to join the research team. However, I also realised this could be an opportunity to overcome my shy and introvert nature. As it turned out over the next three 3 years ,MUN not only gave me the biggest achievement of my life, but also a pathway to contribute to my school. It was a stepping stone to everything I ever wanted to be, both as a human and a delegate. The feel of the microphone and the attention of the audience was exactly what an introvert like me needed. I knew the importance of being able to express my views and seized this enabling environment.
During my involvement with MUN, I have been able to successfully merge geo-polictical and geo-economical knowledge with my leadership and public speaking skills to attain the position of head of delegation. It was a major achievement for my school,team-mates and myself when we won the Outstanding Delegation award at La Martniere Calcutta Model United nations, India.
Aside from the tangible achievement, MUN has been a great catalyst in my passion for economics. The intensive research on various nations has helped me learn about the role finance and economics plays in determining foreign policy. Owing to such exposure, I now raise debates in class on matters both in and out of scope of syllabus and the outcomes of such debates act as a whetstone to my knowledge in economics.
If MUN had provided me with so many qualities then I , too, was able to provide my school with a calm and methodical leader in me who was able to inspire his juniors into winning their very first Best Delegation in Hyderabad, India. Truly, it has been a symbiotic relationship for it is through this journey that I accomplished my most important feat and now I am able to contribute by sharing knowledge with future generations of participants.
WORDS-364