Hi all! this is the prompt for the boston college supplement:
Many human beings throughout history have found inspiration and joy in literature and works of art. Is there a book, play, poem, movie, painting, music selection, or photograph that has been especially meaningful to you?
and this is my essay: (i know its VERY rough, i haven't had the chance to edit punctation and grammar and stuff)
my main question is: does it answer the prompt? if not, how what can I improve on?
The opening sequence begins as pictures of apple galettes and chicken roulades fill the tv screen accompanied by a cheerful song playing faintly in the background. As the scene shifts, suddenly a silver haired man donned in an apron appears; in a heavy french accent, he cheerfully and confidently declares with a flourish, "I'm Jaques Pepin, and this is fast food, my way!"
Although I grew up in a household that did not have cable television harboring typical adolescent channels such Nikolodean or Cartoon Network, I never missed it because my favorite show played on public broadcasting; running early on Saturday Mornings, Jaques Pepin: More Fast Food my Way was a program that I watched with a fervor.
I remember waking up early on Saturday Mornings, bounding out of bed, hair unkempt and pajamas still on, and situating myself in front of the television with my dad who was an avid foodie and shared my love for Pepin. Hearing the staccato of taps that Pepin's knife left on the chopping board and following his steady movements in the kitchen, my dad and I loved seeing the delicious dishes out that Jaques seemed to conjure out of only a few ingredients.
My dad and I, usually after the end of the show, would subsequently hop in the kitchen, and attempt to emanate Pepin with whatever ingredients we had in the fridge; with him volunteering as the sous, measuring and cutting, and me, tasting and mixing, we cooked with flair. Our elation over the perfectly executed recipes, our favorite being Pepin's berry pancakes, crispy yet moist in the center, accompanied with my dad's quirky mantra of "the more butter, the better," helped me overcome the many failed recipes, when they came, of soggy waffles or curdled omelettes. Through our escapades in the kitchen, inspired by More Fast Food my Way, I discovered my passion for cooking and baking. Jaques Pepin showed me through his own love for food, that cooking was not just a rudimentary activity involving vegetables and salt. It required focus, attention to detail and most importantly, emotion.
Presently, having garnered enough experience to cook by my own whimsy, I now see Jaques Pepin's recipes as a guide to my memory, using senses of touch, smell, and sight, instead of solely relying on his show. However, on Saturday mornings, More Fast Food my Way still can be found playing in the background while my dad and I are busy in the kitchen flipping berry pancakes.
I know that food programs are a trend in entertainment these days. However, for this type of essay, you can't really use that as a basis because of the shallowness of the topic. Also, you are using a television show, which is not as impactful and thus effective as a movie. Perhaps there is a movie that you have viewed in the past that has impacted your life in some way? Caused you to have some sort of ambition or life direction? Or even a mantra for your life? You need to use a movie, book, or art work that resonates more with the serious events in your life and caused a change in its direction or helped you learn something new about yourself. I believe that you will benefit more if you revise the total essay and change the topic that you are using as its basis. This essay just does not have the hook, impact, or depiction of a character or trait on your end that will stay with the reader.
I actually like the topic. It is different and very sweet. I think you should talk more about how the show has affected you earlier in the essay. It is a nice and beautiful recount of you times with your dad, but I think you should incorporate how it has affected you earlier on. I think this has the making of a very sweet and touching story, especially if you mention more about your father and that relationship while listening to the show. Obviously these are suggestions. Good luck! And please help me with mine also. And Happy Holidays!
